The Virgins Guide to a Happy Life

51-Time to think

When I opened my eyes again, I was in a hospital. One I had never been in before, but it resembled much of the same cream coloured walls, dirty white floors, dark grey curtains around my bed and for a second I frowned at my lack of privacy. I struggled to sit up on the slightly raised bed and groaned as my body sagged back and I felt so drained and the IV needle in my arm shifted and caused me to groan.

A short stocky woman with short relaxed hair pushed the curtain aside and peeped through. She looked me up and down and turned up her nose before walking towards me and  grabbing my left hand and pulling it roughly and adjusting the IV. I winced and glared at her. She moved to the left and brought the blood pressure assembly to my side and began unstrapping the band to put it across my arm. She  strapped it on and began taking my pressure and I remained quiet, just watching the numbers spike up and up and up and up; finally settling on 145/96 with a pulse of 110. My eyes widened at the readings but she seemed undisturbed by my reaction and she unstrapped the band and moved back to grab my chart from the foot of my bed and jotted down the readings. She looked down at the charts then up at me.

"Yuh husband here to see ya." She said in a nasally voice before walking off. Shortly  after Terrence walked in with blood splattered clothes and a worn out face. I gasped at the sight of him and was about to get out of the bed when his face turned to panic and he came to my side quickly.

"You're okay." He breathed out. I looked him up and down and with shaky hands tried to reach his cheek and when I finally did he leaned his face into my touch and let out a sigh.

"Are you?" My throat burned to talk and my voice sounded much like gravel on a grater. He looked down at his clothes and smiled sadly.

"Much of it isn't mine. But I'm better now that you're okay." I think I blushed, I'm not quite sure what happened just them.

"How did you find me?" Out of all the questions to ask, that was the one I chose to ask.

"With help from your dad and my dad gave up some of his men to help." He said then grabbed my hand in his and began rubbing them with his thumbs.

"My dad?" I was confused. The last person I had called was my dad but my phone had fallen to the ground and I assumed the device was worse for wear now. I possibly missed something.

"Yeah, he was adamant to save you." He looked around the area. "It took a little while, but we finally found you."

"How long was I gone?" My mind wandered to the two numbers I had thought of, either 5 days or 2 and 1/2 days. But that didn't include how long I was strapped to that stupid bed and left to bleed out. My eyes widened, there was a bomb. "What about the..." I trailed off my voice cracking at the thought of the device. Terrence reached out to the table I had beside my bed and handed me a bottle of water. I hadn't noticed it there before and that slightly unsettled me.

"Almost 5 days. You don't have to worry about the bomb, it's not going to hurt you." He leaned forward and kissed my forehead and I clenched my eyes shut. When he moved his lips, I opened the water and drank some. It burned my throat but at the same time it was a soothing relief to have something in my body.

"How long have I been here?" I let out a sigh as my body felt refreshed.

"A couple of hours." He bit his lip, glanced down at my legs then looked back up at me. "You got 16 staples and 144 stitches." My jaw dropped. Did they do so much stitches? I placed the bottle on the bed and pulled back the blanket and stared in horror at the bandage that covered 3/4 of my leg, from right above my ankle to right above my knee. My left leg had a similar bandage, just a bit higher. A sob broke out of my throat and I fisted the gown they had put me in. 

I was silent and Terrence was wise to not to say anything, he remained silent just watching me as I cried over my bandaged legs. Something burned in my stomach and the strong urge to throw up arised but I held it down and swallowed the lump that formed in my throat and with a tear streaked face I turned to look at Terrence.

"Thank you." I said softly then hung my head and wished my bed was completely flat so that I could just stare at the ceiling.

"Of course I would save you." He reached out for my hand and I allowed him to take it. 

"Where's my dad?" I had to thank him. He had also come to my aid in my time of need, even though this war had absolutely nothing to do with him; he deserved my thanks. Terrence gripped my hand tighter and I winced slightly, my body sore. We lapsed into a silence as he refused to say anything and my heart dropped suspecting the worse. "He isn't dead..." I couldn't finish the train of thought.

"Oh God no. He left." He said and I let out a breath. I frowned though, him leaving wasn't unheard of but he was always in the hospital with me when I was admitted. Regardless of the stupid reason for me being there, he was always there.

"What?" My voice came out strained and my body sagged more against the pillows propping me up. 

"He wanted to so I let him." I remained silent.

"Why?" I turned my head to the left so that I wasn't seeing Terrence but rather looking at the dreary curtains in this stupid place.

"He was getting worked up. He needed to clear his head. He might be back tomorrow." I laughed a humourless sound that sounded so full of pain it broke my heart.

"He isn't coming back. If he wasn't here to see me when I woke up, then he doesn't care about me at all." I coughed a bit then turned my head to look at the ceiling. "I guess I was wrong."

"Gwyn-" I cut him off.

"It was probably a good thing, he would have slapped me for not beating Matthew." I laughed again. 

"I wasn't going to let him hit you." He said through clenched teeth. I glanced his way but let my eyes flickered back to the ceiling.

"It doesn't matter, I probably needed it." I laughed again.

"Are-"

"If we left after the wedding, before the wedding it didn't matter, if we left and allowed this fucking war to blow over, I would have been able to feel my legs." I coughed a bit again and Terrence tried to get me to drink some water but I denied it.

"We could have, but you didn't want to. No point beating yourself up over it now, it's long gone and you're safe." He squeezed my hand again but I kept on looking at the ceiling and looked up at the ceiling with woe.

After all everything happened for a reason.

But what was this reason?