Wondering

Chapter 9

Harrys pov

I wake up to Shae crying. She is siting on Kayla's bed explaining everything. They notice I wake up so I go strait to the bathroom so I don't interrupt. I can't hear them from the bathroom. But what I do hear next is Shae leaving again. The door slams shut with nothing but silence left.

When I walk out Kayla is sitting her bed looking at the ground with no emotion.

"Where is she going" I question

"Walking back to the frat house" she says still no emotion.

"Are you okay?" I don't like getting into all this emotional drama shit but she seems like she needs to talk...

"I'm fine" she sighs

"Want to talk about it?"

"Kind of" she says quietly

She begins rambling on about her friend who use to be beaten by her boyfriend a few years back and didn't tell anyone until Kayla found put and did something about it. "I just can't stand to see another person in my life get hurt physically and mentally..." She takes a deep breath "it's just too much"

"Yeah" I honestly don't know what to say. I look into her deep brown eyes with a green tint. They seem to be looking for something...like not physically...mentally...trying to find an answer. Then she looks into my eyes. Piercing me.

___________

Kayla's pov

I can't help but wonder how I could help. What could possibly make Zayn do this? And what made Jace hurt Kailey? They were a great couple. Then all the sudden he started lashing out at her then soon beating her. I made sure it stopped soon after I found out but that was only possible because Kailey was willing to cooperate...Shae won't. Luckily Jace is in jail now and won't be seeing Kailey ever again.

"Harry?"

"Yes?" He responds looking me in the eye.

"What do you think Zayn is capable of?" I say cringing at the thought

"Uhm.." He rubs the back of his neck "I honestly don't know...worse outcome?" He begins but stops himself

"Yea?"

"The worse outcome...killing her...I don't know. He can do whatever..." He trails off

"I mean mentally. Do you think he is capable of doing something like that?" I say hoping he know Zayn well enough to know the answer

"I don't know...I...he is very quiet and isn't very open..." He says

I honestly don't know what to do...every question I have ever asked myself jumbles in my head like alphabet soup. What is Shae doing with him in the first place? Why won't she let me help? Where di-

My question is cut off by Harrys lips on mine. What? I pull away but soon regretting it.

"I-I...that was stupid..." He says "I'm sor-"

This time I cut him off putting my arms around his neck pulling him closer. He puts his arms around my waist then down to my hips pulling me on his lap.

This won't go any further

This won't go any further

I tell myself. It won't, it can't...I don't know him. I can't anyways...not yet...I'm a virgin. THERE I ADMIT IT! I mentally scream.

Ignoring my thoughts I straddle his waist still kissing him. He slips his tongue past my lips and laps his own around mine. His mouth taste sweet yet bitter. His kiss is gentle yet arousing. The way he touches my waist, back, and hips send electricity through me, Aching for more.

"I can't" I say getting off of him too quickly.

"Sorry" he says. Why is he apologizing?

"Don't apologize, I want to...but I...I can't." I say not breaking my gaze.

His eyes burn through me. I am not entirely sure what has gotten into me but I do know I want to...I don't know if it's because it's him or if it's because it's the first time someone kissed me and I kissed them back.

He is so kind and respectful. Plus he's one of the hottest guys I've seen.

He has been speaking the whole time...

"Kayla...earth to Kayla?" He waves a hand I front of me

"Sorry I zoned out"

"Well I do have that affect on girls" he says sarcastically laughing at his own joke. "But why can't you...do you..." He takes a deep breath "have a boyfriend?"

"No!" I say "if I had one I wouldn't have kissed you back" I exclaim

"Oh thank god." He sighs

This is really awkward. I've never been in such a suffocating situation. I want to latch myself to him. Put my mouth in his. But I'm not ready.

"Why then?" He says completely confused. "I'll wait...I don't want at to pressure you...I don't what you to think I'm like that but I'm just really confused" see I told you he was confused.

"I-I...I um" my words stumble together tripping over one another

"Wait a minute" he says with a smug smile "you've neve-" I cut him off

"Yes! God it's not that big of a deal!" I half scream and flush putting my hands over my face.

"Hey, hey. It's fine. I was just teasing, it isn't a big deal" he explains. A wave of relief splashes over me. I thought he was ready to make fun of me.

"Ok" I say quietly

...

It's 9 am and I am starved

"Want to go out for breakfast?" He breaks the silence like he is reading my mind.

"Yea" without another word I stand up to get clothes to change into and realize he doesn't have anything "do you need to go back to your place to get clothes?"

"I need to but I'm not going to. These clothes aren't really dirty or anything so it's fine." He says while rubbing his eye

"Ok" I walk into the bathroom and change out of my pajamas and into a green hoodie with a white trail of stars on the back, and white skinny jeans with black fur boots. I straiten my hair leaving it down an don't bother wearing makeup.

When I walk out he is sitting on my bed. "Ready?" I say breaking the silence

His eyes subtly rake down my body but I pay enough attention that I get a glance if the action. "Yea" he manages to say.

He leads me outside with his hand on the small of my back opening the car door for me. He plops in on the other side and I put in his CD.

"Again?" He whines playfully. His good mood has taken my mind off of everything. I have almost forgotten about the drama we just went through.

"Yes Harry, again." I mock.

His beautiful voice fills the car. The loving words fill my head. I notice out of the corner of my eye he looks at me. His green eyes taking note of how my face lights up during this song. "Do you want it?" He breaks my attention away from the song.

"What?"

"Do you want the CD?" He says glancing at me still keeping focus on the road.

"No, you should keep it so whenever I'm here I can listen to it" I beam...

"Ohh...so this is an excuse to come see me more?" He teases..

"No" I flush at his words

"Yes" he mocks my voice but fails terribly. He starts laughing and I join in. The way his dimples cave in...his head falls back...his teeth gleam...it's so beautiful. Perfect even.

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