QingYu: A Wuxia Tale (Going Through Reediting)

Lemon Scented Oil

(Dayu's POV)

"Do you want to try it?" Captain Wang asked me.

I slowly nodded.

"Are you certain?" he asked again, being cautious.

I nodded again. Even though I am not really that certain. But it's been bugging me.

The whole night yesterday. After hearing from that helper that he let his lover do that act to him, I felt cold. How can he let his lover abuse him like that?

But then he said he enjoyed the act and it only hurt a little. Plus it made his lover happy and satisfied.

I want to make Captain Wang happy. I want him to be satisfied with me.

But that act...how can it not hurt? It hurts a lot. When those monks abused me, I felt like dying that time. I was crying, thrashing, confuse why they will abuse me like that.

Then after abusing me, those monks started lashing me. Saying I am an instrument of sin with my pretty looks. They thrashed me so bad I wish for death.

But I survived, like Mei who was abused before me, he came to that temple before me. And Uncle Shu came to our rescue. He saved us and burn those monks and the whole temple.

Now here is a helper who said that the act is not bad but enjoyable too. And here is Captain Wang saying something about preparing me with oil or fat or beeswax.

They are wrong. The helper and Captain Wang are wrong. No amount of oil or beeswax can make that act not hurtful. No amount of preparation can make it enjoyable.

I am scared. But I will prove to them that they are wrong. It hurt. It will always hurt. I will never enjoy that act. Even if it's with the man I adore...

Captain Wang lifted a hand to caress my cheek. I stayed and tutored myself not to flinch. He stared at my eyes.

"I can tell you are nervous. We don't have to do this Dayu..."

"I want to," I said bravely. And it's true. I want to prove to him and to that helper that they are both wrong.

We had a long staring moment. I can see that he wanted to refuse but I am more determine than him. I will convince him if I have to.

I didn't ask Mei about this because I know he will worry and will try to stop me from my plan to go to Captain Wang to do this.

But now I am wondering. Surely Mei is giving himself to Captain Jiang. Did he find it enjoyable too or he is enduring the act to satisfy his lover?

But I can't ask Mei now. This had to be between me and my lover now. Just us...Captain Wang and me.

Captain Wang sighed, "Fine. Let's do this but we will do this at my phase and my way. Understand?"

I nodded. His way and his phase.

"And if I decided to stop, we will stop. If you want to stop, at anytime, you will tell me. Do you understand?"

Rules. I nodded again.

Captain Wang let out a deep breath again and nodded. He then reach out and gather me in his arms to kiss me.

Oh kissing. This I understand. This I enjoy. I snaked my arms on the back of his neck and return his kisses. Our tongues dueled, our breath mingling.

Then his hands started moving. The Captain is taking off the wet soldier's uniform from my body. I felt cold as my skin got exposed but getting naked with him is also not a new thing for me.