I got home pretty fast, whether it was my paranoid quick pace, or the fact Frank only live a few streets away. It was predictable though, all the kids that went to our school lived near each other.
''Gerard Arthur Way, where the hell have you been." Mom's voice was thick with disappointment, she stood in the kitchen, fingers tapping impatiently on the counter. My voice felt heavy as I tried to speak,
"Ma I'm sorry I-I- I skipped school" I looked away from her eyes, It felt hard to breathe again, a tight chain of guilt pressed itself against my ribcage, I had to break it.
"That doesn't answer my question. Where were you, Gerard?" A tone of worry crept as she tried to mask it with her disappointment. She came over to me and gently clasped my shoulders. She made me look straight into her pale hazel eyes; I loved my Mom's eyes. They were so beautiful even as she aged, her eyes stayed the same, full of life and happiness from memories and even sadness. Even when Grandma Helena died, Mom's eyes held her memory and they reminded me of Grandma Helena every time. Unlike my own pitiful eyes my Moms were something I never wanted to forget.
I did forget however that my Mom's tone was becoming urgent and the chain around my ribcage grew tight again. I blubbered out the truth in a disturbing whine through a few gasps of breath that shot down my airways the wrong way.
"I made a friend," One breath. "H-his name is Frank" Two. "W-we ditched after lunch..I'm so sorry Ma" I threw my arms around her neck and she kissed my head.
"Gerard, you skipped school, you didn’t commit homicide. Why are you getting so worked up about it" The worry tone was back.
I fell silent. I didn’t want to talk about this paranoia and guilt trip thing I had going on. I wasn't ready
"So, Frank..?" I knew that look, It was one of her childish looks that I adored yet it scared me. It screamed, 'I need details Gerard ASAP.' Mom's keenness made me feel puzzled. Frank was only a friend, my first friend in a long time. I didn't want to screw anything up even if my mind didn't want it. My Mom was ecstatic though, she truly though Frank could drag me out of my routine and determination to waste my life away.
I very much wanted to waste my life away. I didn't understand why people couldn't leave me alone and let me.
"We're in most lessons together; he's a pretty cool guy. I think we got on well, we share interests: Movies, books and music. He's an amazing guitarist, he played for me, and well he seems to understand me, instead of being an asshole like most kids...You know what I mean?" I trailed off, I'm pretty sure I was blushing. My Mom just grinned with a smile I don't think I had ever encountered before. I was baffled.
Thinking of my time with Frank and the awkward gossip with my Mom. I liked the way I said "We" when I talked to my Mom.
Throughout my deep speculation of the day gone by I became more and more interested in Frank, I never usually take interest in people, Frank was just so spontaneous. He seemed really happy walking to his home, until I started the topic about the family pictures. It was almost as if he coiled himself into a shell, like a snail when attacked or threatened, he seemed distant and nearly cried on me. Frank was a perplexing character, maybe I only noticed as I understood him.
I was rudely disrupted from my theories by Mom, her voice called up the stairs in a cool tone but she seemed rather .
"Gerard, Mikey's coming home for a while, in a week." Her voice cracked out in joy.
Mikey.
Mikey was coming home.
"Are you serious Mom?" I felt a churn of excitement in my stomach.
