I Hate You But I Love You.

I Hate You But I Love You. Chapter 15

**Lukas P.O.V.**

I silently unlocked the front door and walked into the house. He wasn’t back yet but he better be careful when he returns. Sick bastard.

“Jona,” I called out softly, “Where are you?”

He appeared a moment later, coming out of a door and entering the hallway to face me. I frowned at the door he came out of for a moment and then motioned him to follow me and went into the kitchen. I gently picked him up and placed him on the counter; trying to ignore that belt that was left on the kitchen table.

“How was school? Do you want something to eat?” I asked as I opened the fridge.

He mumbled a yes as he sat there fidgeting on the counter. I sighed and pulled out the materials to make a sandwich.

“Did anyone give you trouble today?”

“No. They don’t bother me when I’m with William.”

“He’s a good friend, isn’t he?” I looked up from the PB&J sandwich I was making to look at him.

“Yes.” He smiled down at his lap, but then it disappeared. “Don’t worry. I don’t tell him about daddy. I know you wouldn’t want that.”

I sighed and placed my hand on his shoulder but I couldn’t look in his eyes, “I never meant for you to find out… you shouldn’t have to know about these nightmares the world holds at such a young age.”

“But… why…”

“I don’t know why!” I snapped suddenly frustrated. I slammed the butter knife on the counter and counted to five, trying to calm down. I took a deep breath. “I’m sorry Jona. I didn’t mean to freak out like that.”

I looked up at him and he met me with confused eyes. “Does mommy know?”

I looked back down at the counter, “…Yes.”

“Then why doesn’t she-“

“She’s suffered too, you know, and now in her condition…” I sighed heavily and looked up at him, “We’ve both been trying to protect you. You don’t need to be poisoned by that man.” I quickly put the two slices of bread together, completing the sandwich.

“But, Lukas…”

“Just forget it ever happened, Jona. Just forget,” I said coldly and placed the sandwich in his lap and walked briskly out of the kitchen and made my way to my room.

I slammed the door behind me, chips of paint falling to the ground. I went to lock the door but stopped. That bastard! The door’s lock was busted in, now I had nowhere to hide in this shitty house unless if I jammed the bed against the door.

I was frustrated and I knew it. Things were just getting worse and worse and it seemed like there was no escape anymore. I lay on my bed, pillow engulfing my face and screamed. I screamed all of the anger and pain I have been bottling up all these years. Why? Why! WHY! None of us deserved this, did we? I screamed so much that tears were starting to leak out of my eyes. You’re weak Lukas, stop this!

I sniffled and lay on my back, staring at the ceiling. I guess I fell asleep because the next thing I knew there was a loud bang from a door shutting. Was it him? Is he home? I felt the anger boiling inside of me.

Looking around I found a text book on the ground and picked it up. And then I went straight into the battle field.

He was in the kitchen looking through the fridge. In my anger I had forgotten how big he was, but I disregarded it and the feeling of fear and walked straight up to him and slammed the book against his head.

There was a thunk and he staggered a little, letting out a curse, and then he turned around to look at me, a beer bottle in his hand.

“You hurt Jona! Why would you hurt him of all people?!” I yelled at him.

He glared at me in disgust and smirked, “Because you weren’t here.”

I stared at him in shock, the fear now coursing through me so much that I thought I would burst.

He took a gulp of the beer, cleared his throat and gave me a vicious smirk, “You’ve been a naughty boy. I think we should take a trip to the basement,” he said as his hand went to the belt that was sitting on the kitchen table.

~*~*~

I shuffled through the school’s hallway, my eyes glazed over and in serious pain; I probably looked like shit right now. Last night was horrible, I shouldn’t provoke him, but at least Jona and mom were safe for now.

“Hey, Lukas,” Mark came up to me and grasped my shoulder which caused me to cringe. He quickly removed his hand and gave me a look. “Again?”

“I don’t want to talk about it,” I mumbled and continued to walk.

“Lukas, you shou-“

“I said I don’t want to fucking talk about it!” I yelled at him. Everyone in the hallway suddenly stopped what they were doing and stared at me. I flipped them off and continued to walk down the hallway.

I shouldn’t have come to school today. But I didn’t want to be around him anymore than possible. Maybe I’ll leave during lunch and go sit in the elementary school playground. That way I can at least walk Jona home.

“Um, Lukas, are you okay?”

I stopped at the sound of Scarlet’s voice. She looked like she didn’t get much sleep, with the slight bags under her eyes. But she looked…worried.

I sighed, “I’m… fine. No need to worry.”

She didn’t say anything, just looked at me, so I took that as my chance to walk away.

~*~*~

It was nice sitting in the soft grass and staring at the sky. I had been cloud watching for most of the day, lying unmoving on the elementary school’s ground, but I think the students were being released.

“Lukas, what are you doing here?”

I moved my head to look up at Jona and his friend William staring down at me, book bags on their backs. Jona looked worried, he probably knew what was going on yesterday, and William looked confused.

I stood up slowly, my back aching, “I came to walk you home from school.”

“Oh. Okay,” he said and grabbed my hand and pulled me down to the side walk.

William said goodbye to turn onto his street and soon enough we were out of ear shot from anyone. I noticed Jona’s hand was trembling a little. Looking down at him I asked, “Jona, what’s wrong?”

He looked up at me, his eyes watering, “Lukas. W-What happened when daddy got home yesterday?” I swear, every time he calls him “daddy”…

I sighed, “Don’t worry about it Jona.” Man, he was probably going to be messed up from all of this. Please just forget, Jona.

“But-“

I stopped and looked down at him, “What did I tell you yesterday?”

He looked at me with wide, confused eyes, “T-To forget.”

I kneeled in front of him and placed my hands on his shoulders, “Please, will you do that for me? Think of it as a bad dream.”

He sniffed, the tears starting to disappear, “I-I’ll try.”

“Good.”

 __________________________________________________________

A/N- I blame the nature of this chapter(violence/depressing-ness) on the fact that I was slightly influenced by this messed up story I've been reading. I feel concerned that I'm able to write something so messed up, but I suppose it makes good drama? Ah whatever, not many people read this anyway. I should probably edit the beginning of the story so it makes sense....

~Atiredpersonsrant~