Been You

Chapter 36: Lose With Me

JUSTIN'S POV:

It's been five days since I've last seen Ely. Instead of feeling like a piece of me is missing, I feel like all of me is gone. She won't even let me explain. But I can't really be mad at her. The way that it looked? And with Selena of all people? I can't be mad. If all I knew was what she knew, I wouldn't want her to talk to me either. But it still sucks. Especially because our second game is in an hour and I haven't been playing the way I should be. My head isn't in the game and It's only pissing me off more. First I lose the girl, now I'm about to lose the game. I feel like shit. But I still have to go out there. And I do. But I miss every shot, I let the opponents skate right by me, and I'm the last one to make it up the rink everytime. Needless to say, we lose the game. The guys are let down and I know they blame me. But they won't say anything to my face. I don't know if it's because they pity me or fear me, after the time I punched Ryan. But either way, I'm grateful. I stay back at the rink for a few hours after everyone has left. I'm trying to at least make one shot, but it isn't happening. By 2 a.m. I give it a rest. I pack up my gear, change my clothes, and start walking home. I keep my head down, sulking over the loss. Losses. Suddenly, a hooded figure runs right into me, knocking me off my feet. Who the hell goes running at 2 a.m. on a Saturday night?

"Sorry, man," the most beautiful voice apologizes, as she runs off, not giving me a chance to speak.

"Ely?" I yell. The figure jogs back tentatively. As they near into the street lights, I realize it is Ely. She's so beautiful, but different than I remember. Her soft, cherub like cheeks are now hollowed. Her bone structure in her face is more prominent. Her eyes, usually wide and rich, chocolate brown are now sunken deeper in and more muted than before. She's wearing a large hoodie, which could almost be my size, but I don't recognize it. This saddens me. So much has changed and she's only been away from me for a week.

"Hi, Justin," she says quietly, sadly. She pulls the sleeves of the hoodie down over her hands. As she nears, I realize her face is covered in sweat. It's forty degrees out, how long has she been running? "How've you been?" She asks, her voice drenched in pain. How have I been? I've lost the most important part of my life, how do you think I've been?

"Awful," I decide on. "I miss you, E." she frowns slightly.

"Justin..." she starts. She says it in that way that she does before she says something that's going to hurt. I can't let her finish.

"Ely, why are you running at 2 a.m.?" I ask, deflecting. But once the words leave my lips, her eyes shift. She's covering something up. No. Fuck. That's why she's... That's why. "Cmon, Ely, we're getting something to eat," I demand. She might be able to change my mind on anything else, but not this. If there's one thing I'm sure of, it's that she's going to eat. Now.

"Justin, I'm fine, I'm just blowing off some steam," she deflects. Again.

"Don't do this shit with me, okay? I know you. It may work with whoever else you've been trying that on," I say, gesturing to the boy's hoodie she's wearing, "but it won't work on me." I grab her hand, leading her to the only place open this late, the diner. She doesn't resist, but even if she did it would be pointless. She's weaker now. What has she been doing? The waitress seats us immediately, the diner is barren.

"I'll only eat on one condition," she says so quietly that I almost miss it. She's sitting across from me in the booth, but she feels so much farther. I hate how badly we've fallen off.

"Anything," I say. Now my voice is the one drenched in pain.

"Tell me why. Tell me the truth."