Save Her (Daniel Howell)

Chapter 17; Freely Caged Creature

P. O. V. Bailey

6 months.

Six agonizingly long months was how long I spent in Bart's Mental Facility.

It wasn't all bad though.

At first, it was tough, the earth shattering change of uprooting my entire life to be stuck in this hospital, only seeing my loved ones when I was deemed 'stable' enough.

For the first several weeks, I wasn't allowed any contact with the outside world. Part of my therapy to become emotionally dependent. Panic attacks, little to no appetite, heavy depressive spells,and crying myself to sleep every night as my mind went through withdrawals of my everyday routine.

Finally, I had my first visit with Dr. Collens, as she wanted to make sure I was in a healthy position before allowing my parents to see me.

I went through a daily monitoring, working through several different types of therapy techniques to help me cope with Amanda's accident. I was allowed an hour of activity in the activity room after lunch, and then I was kept in my room for the rest of the time.

Once I began showing positive progress, I was allowed to come and go from my room as I pleased, so I often went for walks around the facility to clear my mind.

Mom and dad came every weekend, mom often bringing me baked goods or something from my room at home.

Louise, Zoe, and Hazel came to visit me every other week, giving me updates on all the latest gossip.

Phil visited me often as well, once he was allowed, he came to see me twice a week as long as his schedule allowed it.

Dan however...he's only visited me once. About two months after I was admitted, it was my birthday, and mom had threw me a small gathering in the activity room of the facility. He barley said two words to me, just sat in the corner. It made me sad, how distressed he looked. He was probably blaming himself for my ending up in here, but I didn't blame him.

Honestly, I knew this was the best option for my recovery.

Currently, I'd been in the facility for 5 and a half months. The sixth month mark only a few days away, and the doctors were impressed by my stable mind. I felt like a brand new me, like the reset button was pressed in my brain and I was rebooted. I still had bad days, but I was equipped to deal with them.

I was sitting in the activity room playing digital golf with Phil on the computer. Phil was making a pun about the golf term 'Birdie', but my mind was wondering to Dan.

"...Bailey?" Phil saying my name broke me from my thoughts.

"What?" I asked in shock, blinking at him. Phil gave me a questioning look.

I sighed. "Geez, I'm sorry to ruin our time like this Phil. I just really miss Dan. How...is he?"

Phil frowned. "He's...okay. He asks about you after I come home whenever I visit. I think he is blaming himself."

Now it was my turn to give the questioning look.

"He thinks it's his fault for you becoming emotionally dependent on him, and in turn you ending up here. He may even think that you are upset with him."He said.

"But I'm not!" I said, a bit louder then I meant, causing the other patience in the room to give me a funny look. I lowered my voice. "I just wish I could talk to him, and tell him how grateful I am that he was there for me, and didn't baby my emotions. He stepped up and got me help, even when I refused to help myself."

"I'll talk to him." Phil said, and with that Nurse  Ashley came up to us, telling us that visiting hours were over. Phil nodded, and we stood together, hugging before he left, and I walked back to my room.

The next morning, I was awoken by voices outside my door. Mumbled voices, but one I recognized as Phil. Before I could identify the other, the door swung open, and Phil strode in with a smile, followed by...Dan.

My eyes went wide in surprise, but I quickly regained my composure seeing Dan looking a bit uncomfortable. I smiled to him, stood up, slowly walking over to him. I gently wrapped my arms around his waist, lightly hugging him. After a moment, Dan's armed wrapped around me, tightly hugging me. His chin rested on the top of my head, and I buried my head in his chest.

"I missed you..." I mumbled into his chest. Dan chuckled, causing his chest to vibrate slightly, and I smiled.

"Riiiight, well I'm gonna go get a snack from the snack machine. You two have a nice...chat." Phil said, causing Dan and I to jump apart in surprise. I love Phil, but in that moment, I forgot he was in the room.

Phil left, cheekily grinning as he did so. I rolled my eyes with a playful smile on my lips. I knew it was just his plan to get Dan and I in a room alone so we could talk, and I planned to take full advantage of that.

I sat on the edge of my bed, my feet swinging off the edge. Dan sat in the lounge chair next to my bed, and sighed. An awkward silence filled the room.

"So, Phil's probably not coming back." I said, giggled at Phil's goofy antics.

Dan smiled. "He's probably listening outside the door."

We laughed at the image of Phil with his ear pressed to the door like the lovable spork that he is. When the laughter died, and we were silent again, I knew it was now or never.

Just like you learned in therapy, Bailey. When you have something to say, just say it. Rip the band-aid off and things will work themselves out...

I took a deep breathe, and shut my eyes. "We need to talk, Dan. I have to know why you are acting different."

I opened my eyes to find Dan looking at his hands that rested in his lap, looking disappointed. It wasn't like Dan was disappointed, no, this expression on his face reflected self disappointment.

"I...I just couldn't face you. I know it seems a bit hypocritical of me, given that the last time we saw each other I was upset with you over the same thing. I blamed myself for putting you into this position, and not only that, but causing you to almost..." Dan trailed off, looking up at me with red eyes on the brink of tears.

"Kill myself?" I said, causing Dan to flinch. "Dan it's okay. I'm healthy and happy now, as I should be. I realize that you were only doing what was best for me, so thank you. I was upset with you at first, but I wasn't myself. I'm not upset with you, and I know that you were not the reason for my drastic measures. We had a bit of a spat, sure, but I was on a path of self destruction whether you had come along or not. So don't think that this is your fault, I'm grateful you did what everyone else couldn't." I said.

I'd been practicing this speech for weeks, wanting to tell him how much I appreciated what he did for me. Dan looked up at me, and I smiled at him, causing him to smile back.

He sighed, and turned to face the door. "You can come in now Phil."

The door opened and Phil strolled in with his hands in his pockets, looking up at the ceiling as this he just 'happened' to walk in nonchalantly at this moment.

Dan and I laughed and Phil gave us a goofy look. "What? I wasn't listening outside the door or anything!"

"Sure, just like you don't steal my cereal, you spork." Dan said.

Then, there was another knock at the door, and Nurse Ashley came in. She smiled at me, and handed me a piece of paper.

'CONGRATULATIONS! As of today, Bailey Bolt has officially graduated from Bart's Mental Facility therapy program.'

I looked up at Nurse Ashley, smiling wide. "I-I can go home?"

She nodded, and I jumped up, hugging her. She's been my nurse during all of my time here, and we had gotten quite close. She's been the only person I'd talked to for my first few weeks here. She's seen me at my worse, been my shoulder to cry on, and my voice of reason. So I could call her a friend, especially now that I was graduated.

"Doc said you can go home tomorrow. Your parents are being notified now, and will come help you pack in the morning." She said in her thick cockney accent, and then she waved and left.

For the first time in a long time, things were finally going my way.

Welcome back, Bailey.