Camp for the Emotionally (Un)Stable || Lams

Chapter Twelve: Nowhere Near Perfect

|Third Person|

John isn't there when Alexander wakes up. His blanket it gone too, leaving Alex in just his own thin blanket to wrap around himself. However, as soon as he can think coherently, he's tossing the thing aside and angrily shoving it into his bag.

He's not too sure what exactly he's angry about, just that he was fed up with John Laurens and his mind games. He was fed up with this stupid boy who knew just how to push Alex's buttons, he was fed up with having any feelings at all for this douche bag. I need time. What kind of bullshit excuse was that? No, John just couldn't suck it up and deal with his own feelings. He just wanted to keep projecting them onto other people.

Until John could have a reasonable discussion with Alex, he was done spending his time thinking about him. He could go die in the forest for all he cared.

Alex repeats his bitter thoughts in his mind as he packs up the rest of his things and tracks down Peggy at the edge of the trail. Their chaperone stands at the head of the group, some guy named Aaron Alex thinks. He doesn't pay any mind to Aaron and his instructions as he folds his arms and pouts childishly, saying nothing to Peggy who just frowns at him.

She looks back to Maria one last time, flashing her a smile before Aaron waves the group onward. Maria smiles back, though it looks distracted. Peggy tries not to let it bother her too much. It's just paranoia. Angelica always said she let it get the best of her.

"What's up, Alex?" Peggy asks, plastering on a smile that she tells herself feels natural. Alexander's face contorts for a moment before focusing on the ground.

"Boys are dumb, Pegs. Be glad you're gay." He shifts his backpack up further on his back, wrapping his fingers tightly on the straps.

"Is it John?" Peggy asks, earning only a weak nod from her friend in return. He blinks back a couple of tears that had begun to form in his eyes. He hated crying, especially over something as ridiculous as the bastard that is John Laurens. No pretty eyes or soft lips could substitute for the fact that John was emotionally inadequate.

"He kissed me," he shrugs a little, sniffling pathetically. "He fucking kissed me," he mutters again, a little more anger in his words.

"I take it that didn't end well?" Peggy queries, watching Alex's knuckles turn white from gripping his bag so tightly. She chews her lip, unsure of what to do. She's never been the one people come to for these types of things.

"He told me he regret it," Alex says softly, the emotion clear in his voice. His hands loosen on the straps of his bag, suddenly too tired to hold it anymore. "Can you believe that?" He asks weakly, looking to Peggy with sad eyes.

Peggy reaches over to awkwardly touch Alex's shoulder, smiling softly. "John's just weird like that, Alex. I'm sure he'll come around." Peggy picks at her jeans, feeling guilty for lying so blatantly to her friend's face. She honestly had no idea what was going through John's mind right now. He was as unpredictable as they come.

"I guess," Alex shrugs once more, falling into silence for the rest of the hike.

===

Peggy was utterly consumed by annoyance for John Laurens by the time she got back to camp. She'd fumed all the way into her cabin to change, putting on a pair of shorts and a sheer cardigan she remembers Maria saying she liked on her. She chews angrily on her fingernails as she paces restlessly on the outskirts of camp, watching for John's group to come down the hill. She needed someone to take her pent up energy out on, and if that meant chewing out her friend then so be it.

Peggy watches as a couple kids start to filter through the trees toward the mess hall. She sucks in a breath, waiting for John or Maria to appear, remembering they ended up in the same group. When the familiar sheet of dark curls walks down the path toward the center of camp, Peggy wishes she hadn't seen it. She ducks behind a tree, holding her breath as she watches her girlfriend pass, holding hands with another girl- no, not just any girl, her sister.

Eliza and Maria strut into camp, giggling together. Peggy's stomach twists up, her whole body becoming hot as her eyes land on John Laurens. He walks alone at the very back of the group, leaving the area empty as Peggy approaches him, seeing red.

"What the hell, John?" She calls, her hands shaking at her sides. She clenches them into fists, suddenly feeling a little lightheaded. She ignores it for now, glaring up at John who looks back down at her small frame confused.

"What?" He asks, reaching forward to try to calm the girl down. She looked on the verge of a panic attack. She jolts away from his touch though, giving him a sick look and stumbling back a few steps.

"I thought you liked Alex?" She asks cruelly, tugging at the hem of her shirt, feeling her chest rattle. Her breaths become uneven. "What the fuck were you thinking?" She exclaims, bewildered as to how you could be completely in love with someone one day and crushing their heart the next.

She starts to pace again, pushing one of her hands through her hair, trying to calm her breathing. She counts to ten, counts back from ten, repeats it. She sucks in a breath, looking back to him.

"Peggy-" John starts, looking genuinely concerned for the girl's well being.

"You'd better fix this, asshole. You still share a bunk."

She turns on her heel, walking quickly away from John Laurens. He watches her go, starting to think about how he left Alex last night. He starts to feel the guilt set in. 

Double update because it's a rough day for this anxious bean.

Side note: I just got hypnotized and twerked in the middle of my county fair so that's fun.
<3