Camp for the Emotionally (Un)Stable || Lams

Chapter Nineteen: Build Up

Laurens|First Person

I know it's good to get out every once in a while, especially when you're battling depression- which is what the shrink told me. I hardly think I'm battling depression. Sure, I'm sad sometimes, but that's because I miss someone. I'm not full-on depressed because I miss a guy I used to make out with.

I do miss Alexander. Don't get me wrong. I miss him so much sometimes it's easier to pretend he didn't exist at all, but every time my phone rings and it's Peggy on the other line it gets a little harder to forget.

So when she invited me to dinner I told her no Alex. I didn't want any mention of summer camp or anything of the sort. I wanted a normal meal with normal, not messed up people- if even just for one night. 

The Schuylers have a sort of iconic, American dining room. Big oak table with matching chairs, each one with an unspoken designated family member. The head of the table is nearly always empty, and it remains that way tonight as it will for what will most likely be for the rest of the summer. Their father is supposed to sit there, Angelica and Peggy off to his right, Eliza to his left. 

Tonight Angelica sits next to Eliza, leaving an empty seat for me beside Peggy. Their butler serves us lasagna, Peggy's choice. Her favorite. She pats my arm soothingly as I stare down at my plate, not really having an appetite. Angelica shoots me a look from across the table and guilt tugs at my stomach. 

I've spent the better part of my friendship with Peggy and Angelica reminding them to eat. I force a forkful of the pasta into my mouth, cringing as it sticks to my throat like glue. 

"So Angie," Peggy pipes up, smiling fakely. "Are you still going bowling with Aaron tomorrow night?" She leans over the table to take a sip of her soda. 

Angelica shrugs, swallowing her bite of lasagna. "Maybe, I think we might take a break this summer." 

"Why's that?" I ask, glancing over at Eliza who only looks up momentarily before directing her attention back to her phone in her lap. 

Angelica licks her lips, taking a drink of her water before answering. "I don't know," she shrugs, "I mean, he's moving all the way to New York in a couple months. I don't think it's going to work out." 

"Aren't you going to college in Jersey or something, Ang?" Eliza asks without looking up from her lap. 

"I applied  to a school in Jersey. And Penn State, and Columbus," she sighs rubbing her temples. Peggy reaches over and takes her hand, rubbing circles on the back of it softly. 

"It's ok, Angie. You'll get in somewhere," she smiles encouragingly, only getting a weak one in return. 

"You could always go online," I tell her shrugging a little. I nudge my plate further back onto the table. I'm not going to finish eating. "That's what my mom wants me to do." 

Angelica nods, looking back up at us. "You can go, Lizzie. I know you probably have plans tonight." Eliza stands quickly, pocketing her phone and waving at us without looking back over her shoulder. A second later the front door opens and closes. 

"I'm gonna go to bed. Crash on the couch, or wherever, John."  Angelica throws her napkin onto the table and walks around the table to hug Peggy and press a kiss to her hair. "Night, Pegs," she mutters, ruffling my hair, "night, Johnnycakes." 

I smile at her over my shoulder, watching her walk toward the stairs. Peggy pats my shoulder, already standing from her seat. 

"Wanna watch a movie?" She asks as I stand with her. 

"Sure," I shrug. As long as they're letting me sleep at their house I'd gladly watch a movie. It beats my house anyway. 

===

Half an hour into our movie and Peggy and I are both already dozing off on the oversized sectional in the living room. The voices from the TV still hum out of the surround sound speakers, but the low light lulls us into sleep. 

Peggy's snoring before I can even register that she's completely collapsed into my lap. I jolt awake, blinking and rubbing the sleep from my eyes for a moment. I carefully reach over her to press the power button on the remote, leaving the whole house dark and silent. I sigh, reaching for a blanket and tugging it over Peggy and I. 

I'm just about to fall back asleep when a sudden chime from the coffee table makes me groan and squint at the square of light I vaguely identify as my phone. It beeps again before I can pick it up. 

I squint my eyes again, sliding my finger over the screen to see a message from an unknown number. 

From: Unknown 

I need help. 

From: Unknown

It's Alex. 

I groan to myself, rubbing my eyes and setting my phone face down on the couch beside me. I can't deal with this now. 

I know this is an awkward place to end this chapter, but I tried my best. ヽ（´ー｀）┌

Also, yes I did sneak in an Outsiders reference and no, I'm not sorry about it.
<3