Laurens|First Person
"How you been, Alex?" I ask in my best gentleman-y voice I can muster. The thin boy shifts in his seat, avoiding my gaze. I don't let up though. I spent nearly all of summer away from him trying to decipher how to put us back together. I was the Schuyler's most of the time to be fair. My mother hardly missed me. They had much better advice anyway.
"Fine," he tells me, his voice slightly choked. I keep my smile plastered on, refusing to let any other emotion get the better of me. I clear my throat, trying to think of a way to continue.
"Well, what have you been up to?"
"Chores," he mutters, pressing his hands down into his thighs and wincing. I try not to think about it too much as I clench my fingers tightly around the steering wheel. I will myself to stay in check. "What about you?" He asks in a soft voice that almost reminds me of how he used to be back at camp in the seclusion of our little cabin. Sometimes I wonder where we would be if we hadn't spent the year apart.
"Well, I've been at the Schuyler's, and you know how they are," I force a chuckle. I almost think I see his lips twitch. "Peggy's been having a fit because Angie went on anxiety meds. She's been really stressed about college and her flake of a boyfriend, you know." I tell him these things nonchalantly, trying to make it seem as though hardly any time has passed. This might be my chance back into Alexander's life and I'll tiptoe around him as much as he needs me to.
"Really?" He asks quietly, "I always thought her and Aaron would break up right after summer. They don't really work together, don't you think?" He keeps his voice low as he talks, though he throws a little more emotion into it. I can't help but crack a smile.
"Yeah, I've been wondering what's going to last longer, Ang and Aaron or Eliza and her latest fling?"
Alex snorts and I beam.
"I missed you," I test. He pulls his legs up criss cross onto his seat as I continue to cruise through suburban streets with no real aim.
"Hmm," is all he says.
I try not to let it bother me too much. "When are you getting out?"
He shrugs, seeming to be ready to respond to this one. Maybe he's been thinking about it a lot.
"I gotta get a job and a place to stay first," he says, a little bit of sadness tinging his voice. I'm suddenly terrified that he's going to break down right there.
"Oh," I mutter softly in response.
"You should drive me back now," Alex tells me, gesturing to the clock on my truck's radio. I sigh to myself, not ready to let him go.
"Ok," I tell him reluctantly. "Do you think you could sneak out tonight? I want to keep catching up with you," I tell him honestly. He shrugs again.
"Not tonight, John." I feel my body physically droop. He reaches over to me with a tentative hand. It pats my shoulder lightly.
"Come back next week. By then I'll be almost ready to get out," he tells me, a tad bit of excitement in his usually monotone voice. I glance over nervously, ecstatic to see a near-genuine smile on his face. I return it with full authenticity.
"You could always come stay with me, Alex. You're always welcome."
"Thanks, John," he tells me, and it sounds like he really means it. I feel my heart jump like it used to when we were still in the early stages of flirting. It all seems like years ago. Everything feels so messed up now. I wish we could go back and I could completely redo our whole relationship. I feel like I'd do better the second time around.
"I'll miss you," I tell him almost sarcastically as we pull up outside the dingy group home. This time he returns it with a half smile. I feel my whole body grow warm at the gesture.
"Hey, John," he pauses before opening his door.
"Yeah?"
"Think you could bring an IPhone charger next time? Then I could use my roommate's phone again to text you." He flashes a charming smile as he climbs out onto the sidewalk. I nod dumbly, suddenly very jealous of this roommate figure. What I would give to share a room with Alexander Hamilton again...
"Sure thing," I manage. He smirks and I blush. I quickly turn away from him, embarrassed as he walks up to the home again. It seems as though the table have turned.
As I drive back through town toward the hotel I'm staying at, my mind wanders to thoughts of Alexander's new cocky demeanor. I can't help but fantasize about what I would be like if he would've packed his things and met up with me tonight. If I'd just taken him back to the hotel with him.
I wonder if he still even likes me anymore. If I have to start from square one, or if we'll just pick up where we left off once the awkward tension is gone. I really hope the latter is what's going on. The thought of having to flirt my way back into Alexander's life again sends an odd wave of sadness over me. I don't think I could just start over with him. I feel like we're already in too deep.
Maybe by next week I'll be able to tell. Maybe then I can take him home and figure out how to keep my life and his connected, even if he doesn't want it the way it used to be.
Second update in one week? Whaaaat? A short little filler, but it was a little fluffy.
Questions on Alex or John's behavior?
Question: What's the dumbest thing you're scared of? Mine would have to be chickens. Idk, but for some reason they pertrify me.
<3 Rye
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