I Choose You

Do I Wanna Know?

Unedited

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(Do I wanna know?)
If this feeling flows both ways
(Sad to see you go)
Was sorta hoping that you'd stay
(Baby we both know)
That the nights were mainly made for saying
Things that you can't say tomorrow day

- Arctic Monkeys

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Somehow I had reached the lunchroom before Maggy or William. I headed straight to the back, where our empty table awaited. After cleaning my seat, I sat down and pulled my lunch out of my messenger bag. I had just opened my snack bag of carrots when I saw Maggy storming over to me with a raised eyebrow. Before she even got to the table, I could sense that I had done something wrong.

"Okay, spill," Maggy spoke in an exhausted tone as she sat down across from me. Her green eyes burned with curiosity.

Nibbling on a carrot, I wondered what she thought I had to tell her. "Spill about what?"

"For starters, yesterday you were smiling like a fool who found gold. Today you came into school with this look like someone had run over your childhood dog. When asked, you wouldn't say what was wrong with you. Even though you swore that no one had died or is dying and that you're fine.

"Then," Maggy goes to explain, "William tells me that all during first class you ignored him and seemed to be stuck in your own little world. Don't hide it. I know what those signs put together mean. You have a boy-toy and now he's causing trouble. Who is it? What did they do? Why haven't you told me about it?" Maggy asked.

I sat my carrot down, no longer hungry. The truth was, Maggy was right I was having a little boy issue. Icarus had not texted me for twenty-four hours. I had sent him a message the previous night on the way home from work. I'd asked him how Turtle was doing, after not hearing back from him since earlier that day.

But, Icarus had not replied and it worried me. I would have accepted a one-word response about Turtle, like 'good'. Instead, I got nothing but worries. I wasn't worried because a guy I'm interested in had stopped communicating with me. I could get over that because I'd told myself from the beginning that he only thought of us as friends. It was in preparation for the moment I was experiencing, so it wouldn't shock me that he drops off the face of the Earth.

But Turtle was a different story altogether. I loved that cat. I cared for him every single night since he showed up on my window seal. He was my responsibility and I wanted to make sure that he was okay.

"Nothing's wrong, Maggy," I told her as I packed up my lunch, knowing I would finish later if I got hungry.

"Did she tell you what crawled up her ass?" William asked as he sat down next to Maggy, passing her the second tray he had.

I realized then that William had gone to the lunch line and gotten both him and Maggy lunch. He did this so Maggy could be alone with me and pester me about what was wrong. He always assumed that if either Maggy or I was upset and unwilling to speak that the other girl could get the other to fess up about what was wrong. And, sometimes it worked but that wasn't the case this time.

Maggy playfully slapped William on the chest, "cut it out."

I grabbed the strap of my bag and stood up.

William looked up at me, "Where are you going, Gray? Don't leave we were just messing with you. We promise to leave you alone. Stay."

"I have to hang up flyers for my boss about a position opening at The Maine Tearoom. I'll catch you two later," I give them a quick smile before exiting the lunchroom. I knew if I stayed there any longer, even with William's promise, I would end up being coaxed into telling them what was wrong.