To Let Go

Twenty Nine

||A Short Story From Leo's Perspective||

A loud groan comes from the bedroom where she sleeps.

It's about midnight when. I power off my laptop I use for work and set it aside. The first few nights after starting to refeed are often the most uncomfortable for the patient, or so I've been told. I hear the loud, sorrowful moan that is caused by pain. I walk to the door way and knock.

"Come in." She answers softly.

She's curled into a tight ball, clutching her stomach. Tears roll down her face.

"Emma?" I stand at the door frame.

"It hurts..." she whimpers. "My stomach hurts." I walk over and sit on her bedside.

She cries harder, and I pull her into my arms. Just like old times. She buries her face into my neck, and I rock her back and forth, almost like a small child.

"I'm sorry." She whispers, tears soaking my shirt.

"Don't be." I say, stroking her hair.

At some point, she falls asleep in my arms, and I do too. And I get a remembrance of when we were in the hospital. And for the first time, I feel as though I know who she is again.
I know her.

"Morning." I say, as she sits down at the kitchen table, trying to wake up.

"What....what are you doing?" She asks, baffled by the covered plate in front of her.

"I...though maybe you'd want to try to eat today.

"I'm sorry, I can't." She starts to exit the room.

"Okay." She turns around at me, annoyed.

"That's it!? Okay!?" She throws up her hands. "You're not going to force me?"

"And that's a problem?"

"No it's just.....I though you'd argue with me about it, like always."

"I've given that up along time ago. Why are you yelling??" I ask calmly.

"Because you aren't!" She says, getting more frustrated by the minuet.

"Well, if you aren't interested in getting better, I'm not interesting in helping." She looks stunned. It pains me to say it, so does her look of shock. As she turns to go back to sleep, I decide to give her the chance I should've given long ago.

"Can we make a deal?" I ask, hoping for a good response. She comes back and sits at the table, leaning forward, clearly nervous.

"Okay. What are you thinking?" She twiddles her thumbs.

"If you agree to eat twice a day for two weeks, and I stay here to monitor you, I won't send you to a treatment center."

"I don't know... that's a lot of food."

"Once for two weeks. Same rules apply."

"Deal." She nods. I smile."but for the record, it's not a punishment if you stay to monitor me.

"Are you saying you still have feelings for me?" I gasp, only partly joking.

"Oh, Leo, please. That's a fragile boundary to push." And then it doesn't feel as awkward.

It's just like old times.
Just like ten years ago.
Just like it was when we went apart.

But this time, it's different.
Because I know more.
And she knows that too.
And this time, she trusts me to help her.

Emma Chota, it is a privilege to know you.