BEN drowned x reader (Threads) [Complete]

CH.14 "to break the pattern"

I woke up and BEN was standing right to my bed holding my hand, he smiled and kissed my cheek. I tried to sit up but he pushed me back gently. I looked up at him, and he sighed. "Last night, someone, I have an idea who, stabbed you and I called you an ambulance" he paused looking away. "you blacked out. I thought I would lose you." he hugged you, you hugged back. You noticed how quiet you'd been. "Thank you, BEN. I'm glad you were with me or I'd be a goner right now." You both pulled away and BEN nodded. He handed you a bottle of water, and you took a small sip. BEN looked down, he looked guilty. You grabbed his hand and smiled at him. Clearing your throat. He looked up, into your eyes. Yours looking back into his. "BEN, I've known you for some time now. I noticed my feelings for you, and I know you'll return them. So, just. I love you, please don't blame yourself for the reason I'm in this bed." your voice shaked slightly. BEN flashed a grin, but it faded and he breathed out. "I love you too, but it is really my fault. The guy, he was my friend. He knew you were supposed to be dead. Remember when we first met?" he said quietly. You nodded. "Well, you were supposed to comitt suicide by insanity, but plans changed. He knew this, he thought my feelings were stupid. When I was gone almost all day a couple days ago, when you hung out with Carlos-" he paused again, and smacked himself. "I talked to him, he was going to kill you. I didn't take it seriously and I regret it. I'm an idiot." you shook your head. "its okay, I'm not dead. And you're not an idiot..." you gave a small side smile. "I love you." he chuckled, nodded, and looked away. "Love you too." he replied, his tone sounding casually. You kissed the corner of his mouth. "We'll get through this."