Maybe if I were less dramatic
Or less sensitive
Maybe if my past wasn't mine and my story had a better start.
Or maybe if I have learned to let go of things
Maybe It will be easier
Maybe if I wasn't a smartmouthed bitch to hide my lack of confidence.
Or maybe if I had more straights than weaknesses.
Maybe if I wasn't such a extremist with everything
Or if I could understand that it's ok to make mistakes, that its ok being wrong sometimes
Maybe, just maybe... I will be happier.
Maybe if I had the guts to say what I am thinking and I wasn't worrying all the time about what people think of me.
Maybe if I had more faith in people and wasn't scared all the time of being hurt,
If I could let my guard down
Or maybe if I was prettier or nicer,
If I was stronger or smatter
If I was braver or better
But I am not.
I feel too much
And cry too much
I am scared most of the time,
And I over react about everything
I have a fucked up past and I am weak as hell
Sometimes I cant keep my shit together and I lost it
I hurt people that get closer to me and judge almost everyone when I am not a role model.
I can be really selfish and bitchy sometimes.
And also I can give everything to a person and don't spect anything back.
And maybe all that makes me a shitty person
But thats who I am.
And there are so many "maybes" that can make life better, or that can make people almost perfect.
But thats all they are "Maybes" and we could try to change that and have a better shot of happiness.
But whats the fun of that?
Whats the point of making so much effort to be different?
You don't need to change.
You need to grow up,
and try every day to be the best version of yourself
And maybe there you will experience what real happiness feels like.
And thats all we get, a promise that maybe someday in the future the things will turn out ok and you will satisfied with your life.
That maybe you will look back and be proud.
And maybe thats enough.
I really don't know.
Maybe I can be right,
But maybe I can be wrong.
