Thoughts • l.mh

•13•

Please don't let him be there
Please don't let him be there
Please, pleaseeeeee don't let him be there

      Y/n continued to pray silently to herself while walking as fast as she could towards the gardens.

     It had been an hour and a half since y/n had talked to Mark in their secret meeting place, but she was heading back there again.

She sighed with relief as she went into the open and overgrown area. Mark wasn't there. She was alone.

After she had went to jaemin's house, y/n needed a place to stay away from others. Her mind buzzing, she let her feet carry her to the nearest place, which was the garden.

It wasn't that she disliked Mark, she just needed a place to go without people. She sat down on the dusty bench she had an hour and a half ago. She fished around for her headphones and played the first song on her phone.

Surprisingly, she hadn't used the music app since the time she went to the mall. It had to be at least a week and a half ago. The app immediately connected her to her Dean Playlist.

Tell me what to do,
I don't know what to do,
Your love is just a memory.

"Oh wow" y/n muttered to herself. "Just the song I needed" she said sarcastically. She quietly hummed the chorus to herself and just say there, with her heavy heart. She jumped while hearing rustling coming from the small entrance in front of her.

Mark blinked, staring at y/n in front of him. He felt dumb holding his lunch in his hand, while she stared back at him in shock as well.

"Dude it's like 4:30 why are you eating?" Y/n asked him, looking at his paper bag in no hand. He stared at her for a second, and then at his lunch, like his eyes would justify his response.

"I! Uh! Uhhhuh..." Mark stuttered out. "I didn't eat. Breakfast. Or lunch." He managed to say. "Why are you here?" She stared at him suspiciously.

Everyone knew that Mark and his friends were all idols at SM entertainment, but everyone knew that they were extremely uncomfortable talking about the topic, so no one brought it up. Like everyone else, she remembered the story about how when a fan confronted jisung and asked him about what's happening in SM studios, he got so scared he ran away. After that no one wanted to put the boys through a uncomfortable situation again.

Y/n knew she shouldn't bring it up, but she was in a bad mood so she said anyway. "Are the SM people starving you?" She asked sarcastically. When she saw Mark's startled and hurt expression, she immediately regretted it.

"Oh, Mark! I didn't mean it!" Y/n said hastily, trying to fix what she just did. "I'm just, things happened at jaemin's house that I regret." She blurted out.

Expecting Mark to comfort her, she was shocked when she saw him turn away from her.

      "Yeah, uh sorry about that." He said. "I, uh gotta go." He turned to leave, not looking at her. "And uh," he gave one last look at her. "Some people in SM actually treat me better than people in school, if that's what you wanted to hear."

Mark knew how pathetic he must look, walking out of the garden holding his food. He knew that y/n was watching him but he didn't want to look at her.

"Mark! Wait!" Y/n said as loud as she could, making Mark hesitate on the way out. She grabbed his arm, and pulled on it so he turned around and faced her. As soon as he looked at her fully, she pulled him into a tight hug. He didn't move for the first second, but hugged her back after. "I'm sorry" she whispered.

He felt something warm and wet land on his shirt, and realized with a start that y/n was crying. Guilt from him deciding to turn and leave was pouring over him. He hugged her tighter.

"It's just," Mark whispered, "I'm so used to taking care of people. I don't know where to go when I feel-" his voiced hitched and tears welled in his eyes.

"Aw, y/n," he said, smiling a little "you're making me cry also." Y/n gave a shaky laugh in response.

They stood there for a while, hugging, their hearts broken for different reasons, but their tears flowing in sync with each other.

A/N: was this too sappy?? Sorry~