TOO GOOD ; Phan

t h i r t y s i x

I know I can't miss another school day, and by that I mean I don't want to. I want to see Phil, but don't particularly want him to see me. After sleeping, everything hurts a little less, but I'm still achy. I deserve this pain. It's fine.

I pull on a white hoodie, making the hood cover my bruised jaw. I'm still in the t-shirt and jeans from yesterday, because I tried to take them off but it hurt too much. 

hi! u coming to school today? Phil texts me.

yeah

do u wanna meet somewhere before class??

sure, where?

i'm at the school gates rn

okay i'm on my way

Now, I'm not one to do exercise, and my legs hurt a crap tonne, but I run. Run out of the building of flats, hearing a greeting from someone who probably doesn't give a crap about me, but that doesn't exactly single them out.

"Hey," I say, panting, with my palms on my knees.

"Did you run here?"

"Oh, uh, yeah."

"Why?"

"Didn't wanna make you wait long."

"Thanks, but I don't mind."

"Also I didn't want to wait long," I say with a little giggle, which I'm almost certain was accidental.

We sit down on a bench outside of the school building, my legs pulled up to my chest as I lean the side of my head on my knees, looking at him and laughing at a stupid thing he said. I don't know why, or what it is about him, but I feel like I'm someone else around him. I don't feel like Dan who wants to end his life, I feel like Dan who lo- likes someone a lot, and is happy. I like this Dan more, but I am not always this Dan.

"Hey, Dan?"

"Yes."

"If I had a dog called Minton that ate a shuttlecock, you know what I said to him?"

"What?"

"Bad Minton."

And then I lose it. It's not even a funny joke, in fact, it's horrendous, but I burst out laughing, tears streaming my face. Not empty tears, not sad tears, happy tears. 

"What?" He asks defensively, but jokingly. 

"That joke is just so,"

"Amazing?"

"Crap, but it's amazing too."

We're so close, thighs touching. Usually, I hate being this close to people, it worries me, but this is fine, this is nice. I rest my head on his shoulder, and I hear his breath hitch ever so slightly. That's how we sit for the few minutes before the bell rings, in complete silence, but it's comfortable.