one true pairing - otp, trixya

6

Katya POV

"Are you sure you don't want me to go home? You're spending the night with your boyfriend. Why should i stay?!" I yell at Brian who stared at me idiotically. "No! Don't go! Please! I really want you two to try and get along." He says with an attempt of a persuasive voice.

"Well it's already 11 so there's not much time to bond with your boyfriend before i sleep." I pull out a T-shirt from my suitcase. "I can't believe i haven't slept in my own crusty ass bed in a whole week. It's about 15 minutes away- i miss it so much!" I fake cry while i take my top off and swap it with the one i'll be wearing to bed.

"So where will i sleep now?" i ask. Brian raises an eyebrow. "What do you mean? You always sleep in my bed?" He says (again, idiotically.) "Brian! Your boyfriend is here. You really think he wants me to sleep in the same bed as you? I mean we involuntarily end up spooning and cuddling so much while we sleep." I realise the awkwardness of what i just said and turned red. "I'm sorry-I-erm--"

"Let's go back inside. He's probably waiting." He bites the inside of his cheek avoiding replying to me.

We walk back inside into my living room. "Sorry, was just putting my pyjamas on." Brian smiles at Chris who was sitting on the couch staring at the TV. "It's fine." He looks away and taps the space on the sofa next to him, obviously for Brian. As Brian walks towards him, i walk around to the other couch and fall on it.

No one talks for nearly 20 minutes. Eventually, I do. "I'm going to get blankets and stuff for the couch, you guys do some smooching or whatever. Be right back." I jump up and walk through the hall and into the storage closet that had all of Brian's extra blankets and pillows. I walk in and close the door behind me, switching the light on.

Now my feelings can finally come out.

My poker face was absolutely great. I don't think i seemed phased at all about anything. I hope not anyway. But the truth is - my heart aches. Seeing Brian so close to someone he's in love with, who he calls his boyfriend makes me feel physically sick, if anything. I can only wish him to be so close to me again, to cuddle up to me the way he would when he didn't have a boyfriend - or when i didn't know he had a boyfriend.

I close my eyes and slide down the wall so that i ended up hugging my legs on the floor. I stare straight ahead at the layers of folded bed sheets, pillows and blankets. Oh yeah, that's what i came for.

I'm sleeping on the couch.

I've slept on Brian's couch once before and that was with him next to me. An accidental nap! Every other time i've stayed round at his apartment we would end up cuddling our lives away in his large and comfortable bed. He would hug me tight and our legs would intertwine. His head would rest on my chest and my chin on his head. We'd be so close together in such a huge bed.

Okay Brian, stop. I need to stop.

I get up from the floor, grabbing a pillow and a blanket for me to sleep with, making my way back to the sofas we were all silently sitting at.

"I'm gonna probably try to sleep now." I say, making the two look up at me. "Oh yeah, sure. We'll go into my room then." Brian smiles at me. I nod, and set my bed for the night. The two go down the hall and hear his bedroom door close. I sigh and drop into the sofa, attempting to get comfortable. After a few minutes, however, i hear another click of the door. I close my eyes quickly and pretend to sleep. I hear footsteps coming towards me.

"Bria- Oh." It was Brian's voice. "Thank you, for everything. I love you." I feel a kiss on my forehead and hear running and again, a door close. I keep my eyes close, i should probably actually sleep.

I smile.

I love him too.

•

"Hey, wake up. Wake up." I hear whispers and am shaken until my eyes open wide. Brian was sitting on the edge of the sofa i was sleeping on, shaking my side so i would wake up. Well at least it worked, i'm awake. "Brian?! Are you okay? What's wrong?" I sit up, rubbing my eyes.

"I'm fine, i just had a bad dream. Kinda cringe but yeah sorry for waking you." He mumbles, shrugging at the end of his sentence.

I smile. "It's fine. What time is it?" I ask. "Like 4am." He smiles happily and i drop back onto the couch, attempting to fall into the comfortable position i had slept in. "Do you wanna talk for a bit then? Until you get tired again?" I yawn. "No it's fine, i'll go back. I don't want Chris to wake up in the middle of the night without me there." He places his hand on my face. "You know what, maybe a few minutes." He gets up from the small space on the sofa he was sitting on and instead crosses his legs on the floor.

My face, which was sidewards considering i was lying down, was right in front of his. "What was your dream about?" I ask. "I don't remember. Just remember waking up sweating and worried." He explains. "I didn't wanna wake Chris up. I used to stay over at his a lot near the end of our relationship- the first time- and would have a few nightmares. He would just cuddle until i fell asleep again but i'd much rather have talked to him. I don't think he wanted to though, so he just held me until i eventually forgot and slept again."

Wow, 4am talks are deep.

"Oh." I whisper, still staring right at him. "I'm going home tomorrow morning. You can spend the day with your boyfriend." i say 'boyfriend' in a sing-song tone and he pushes my shoulder slightly. "Shut up." He groans.

Our laughter fades into silence. We don't speak, we just stare. At this moment, there's nothing i would rather do than grab his face and kiss him. Than to tell him how i felt, to tell
him i love him.

"I... i'm gonna go back. Just in case." He stumbles up onto his feet. "Night again, Brian." He leaves the room. No hug, no kiss, nothing. I guess i would just have to get used to it being this way now.