Truth

Let it go

I won't lie his words had me shaken up, so much so that focusing on my script was hard; in my minds eye I saw visions of myself being devoured by a gang of zombielike men, I shuddered at the thought. Chills pulsed through my body starting from my hands right down to my sandaled feet; my heart raced and my head felt as if it could simply float off of my head, I despised the snake; I was afraid for myself and trembling in my sparkly sandals. I felt the tears slide down my cheeks and tasted the salt; frustrated tears are always so salty when they come from my eyes.

"Snap out of it!" I scolded myself firmly, I may be trembling but I was at work ; I had to be professional, "You're going to get it together do your interview and go home." I reaffirmed myself as I slowly emerged from the palm tree's shade. I glanced around my environs half wishing to catch a glimpse of Chris ; after all it was his house and I suddenly felt the need to urinate. I began my cool and calculated walk back to the muraled   walls that had enticed me so much, there was going to be an interview today and I was going to be the epitome of poised ; well as poised as one could be with buckling knees and a weak bladder anyhow.

He reemerged, now wearing a blue t-shirt and a fitted denim jeans; his face became full of concern as I came into full view. " You were crying weren't you?" I felt my head give a dainty little nod, my eyes were filled with a childlike determination; " Big girls don't cry , we have moments", he chuckled his eyes gentle and demeanor relaxed; " I like you Jai, I like your energy it's positive..." he paused before continuing with a much firmer tone; " You're like a little lamb, and lions like young lambs.." I observed him with timid intrigue , that is until the frustration within became a ball of fire and sass which I released from my trembling lips:" So are you a lion then ?"  He lifted his eyebrow amused by my newfound fire and taken aback by my sentiments; he suddenly rested one arm around my waist , I paused in my tracks. 

My heart pounded as his eyes examined me with full passion, he seemed to delight in my shock as  his hands traveled down to my ample behind giving it a firm squeeze , his lips swiftly found my neck as he proceeded to make a trail of soft butterfly kisses, I bit my lip to sustain moans. "You like that don't you?" his words were seductive but his smile was sly, he was up to something; "Little lamb you have a lot to learn about lions..." he walked away in a confident stride leaving me feeling both intrigued and disgusted, I struggled to regain composure.

Our eyes made four once more as we sat on his couch; the camera-crew had long arrived and I was fifteen minutes into an intense interview; " So tell me , Chris do you believe that there is a big divide between Chris Brown the artist and Christopher the person?" my voice is steady and my demeanor is poised and professional , any trace of our earlier interaction is long gone , it's game time now and we are both playing to a T. His reply is well contemplated but genuine; "You know what it is, people see what they want to see, so if they see me as a thug then thats what they see, and if they want to see my positivity and my growth then thats what they see, i'm just myself.." within his eyes I can see that there is much more to be said; but I decide to leave it be, information must be gained gradually." Alright then, now you've recently had a child tell me how was that like on you emotionally?" He smiles , clearly this topic is one he enjoys discussing; "Becoming a dad you know it just does something to you, its like I have this mini me now and I gota proctect her and be like her honest role model, she's my inspiration now, like the money,cars, hit records they don't compare to my daughter .." I smile in response to his smile , the static air is now filled with a friendly chemistry; " Now about this al-" my words are suddenly bought to a halt as the camera man yells; "The camera just died out and that dimwitted little intern forgot to bring the back-up, we're going to have to head back to the studio to get it!" his words are rushed and panicked a quick glance around at the floor crew reveals that the panick is shared. My response is calm;"Well ..I'll stay here and finish off the interview for the magazine article "..I turn to face Chris my face filled with fierce determination and my eyes pleading; "Would it be possible to reschedule the interview for the show?"

He takes his time contemplating his eyes playfully taunting me, his face is relaxed and his body outstretched ;" What if I say no?" the urge to succeed overrides my fear for a moment and my reply is swift:" You won't." he takes in my new found sass with one amused eyebrow raised ; "Well alrighty then, I'll check the schedule, but you'll have to do it on my terms." his reply is flirtatious and meant to challenge I rise to the occasion ; "I'll do that on one condition ..no question is off limits." he looks at me with sheer amusement; " What makes you think that 'll let you do that?" , I may be timid but I am determined ; "You'll do it because it will boost your image and bring you closer to your fans, killing two birds with one stone, plus it's a magazine that caters to young women just as innocent as me looking for a thrill, you can become their Christian Grey." he leans in his face revealing deep contemplation his words are calm and seductive; "For a church girl you sure know how to play dirty.. ok I'll play your game." My heart thumps wildly in my chest, I am giddy with delight as I cautiously reach out my hand. A firm handshake seals the deal.

The lamb is in the lion's den.