Toxic Love

Too far gone

Jax pov
The withdrawals were clawing back. I'd run out of methadone this morning. The alcohol barely taking the edge off of them anymore. I'd promised myself I'd stop for Emma, though maybe I could cut down first. Reduce my intake, the end game would be the same. I'd be clean and straight, a recovering heroin addict. A man she deserved and could love and depend on.

We were in the middle of the party room as I like to think of it. Everyone around us was dancing and enjoying themselves. Drunk, messy it didn't really matter did it? No harm was being done, everyone was chilling and enjoying themselves.

Emma was dancing. Grinding her body against mine, wearing only my Tshirt as a dress. Her body doing things to me that I could of only imagined before I met her. She looked beautiful and carefree. This is how I wanted our life to be. No more drama, just fun and happiness. I turned my face as Emma spun to face me. Knowing the pain of withdrawal would be clear on my face, I wouldn't be able to hide it from her. She would know.

Feeling the latest cramp easing off I held up my can to Emma, silently asking if she wanted another drink. She shook her head in reply, it was far too loud in there to converse. I lent forward and kissed her on the head before walking off in the direction of the bar.

I glanced back, Emma was still dancing where I left her. She would be fine, I'd only be a few minutes. Facing forwards I walked to the bar. When I arrived I pointed to the Jack Daniels whiskey. The barman nodded and grabbed a plastic cup. I didn't think the Jd would help but by this point I'd willingly try anything. I knocked the shot down easily, enjoying the burn. It only seemed to light the fire in my belly, the fire that was calling to be put out by the only thing that would help.

I lifted the cup to the barman who quickly refilled it. I quickly downed it and placed the cup on the bar top. I turned and lent my back against the bar, watching people briefly. I noticed a guy glaring at me. I glared back, what the fuck was his problem. Before I knew what was happening, I felt a fist fly into the side of my face. Knocking my head sideways.

You've got to be fucking kidding me. I turned to the guy, didn't he realise I was fucked. Another few punches and I'd hit the deck and Emma would be left alone. Fuck. Emma. Looking at the guy I had no recognition of him or any idea of his issue. He was shouting in my direction but all I caught was something about his girl and he motioned to a girl by his side. I looked towards her confused and that made him shove me.

Laughing, I put my hands up in a surrendering way. I think this guy thought I was after his missus. I'm all for protecting your girl, I'd defo get my hands dirty for mine. Emma, she's gonna be worrying where I am. I tried to shout at the guy that I wasn't a threat, his bird was safe, I had my own women. He didn't appear to be listening.

I went to walk off. I was done with this drama and Em had been alone for far too long for my liking. The guy grabbed me and I finally realised we would have to do this the hard way. Turning back round to face him, I swung back before connecting my fist with his nose. Not waiting a second, I grabbed his head and drove it into my knee. He fell backwards hitting the floor, clutching his nose and belly. I wasted no time straddling him and driving both fists in his face relentlessly. I felt a pair of arms lifting me off him. I glanced down and smirked, his girl was screaming, I was grateful for the music, I couldn't hear her and he was just a bloody mess.

Thinking I was about to go round 2, I threw my body weight forward. The person holding me released me and I turned to see it was Mark. Sighing in relief I allowed him to grab my arm and lead me out the room.

     Once we got away from the noise, I followed him into his office.

"What's the fuck was that Jax?" Mark shouts at me, clearly pissed.