Toxic Love

I couldn't breath. My heart was breaking and my head was reeling. I was torn, torn between slinking away and hiding under a rock, hoping I would never have to feel this pain again and going back in my room and demanding to know what the hell was going on. My previous drunken actions forgotten by the sobering demand Jax had just made.

The more I stood outside the door staring the more angry I got. I was hurt and broken but most of all I was angry. Who did Charlie think she was and what the fuck was she doing with Jax. Don't even get me started on him, how dare he just brush me off. Did he even know it was me.

My thoughts were all jumbling round my head as hot tears were spilling down my face. Jax was in there, our room, half naked with another girl. The man who I had given my heart and trusted with it told me to fuck off as though I was nothing. Nobody to him.

I had to make a choice my gut was telling me to leave. Walk away and never look back. Hide away from everybody and forget them all but I didn't think I could do that. As much as these people were Jax's biological family. I'd grown to love them as my own. Walking away now without knowing what's going on would mean leaving them behind, as well as Jax.

My head on the other hand was demanding I go in there and find out why my boyfriend would tell me to get the fuck out. If I was leaving, I'm leaving with my head held high. With the facts and knowing the truth.

I take a deep breath and place my hand on the door handle. Turning the door handle and pushing the door, I take a step inside. Without pausing I flick the light on and assess the scene in front of me. Jax is laying on his back, still in his boxers. Charlie was fully clothed curled in a ball beside him, although they weren't touching. They were both asleep or appeared to be at least.

I walked towards Jax's side of the bed, where Charlie was currently laying. I thumped her shoulder with my casted arm.

"What the fuck?" She groaned rolling to face me. Her eyes widened when she saw me standing there.

"Get the fuck out of my house" I screamed at her.

"Last time I looked this house didn't belong to you. It's Jax's, why don't you ask him if he wants me to stay or go" she said smugly.

She turned slightly to look in Jax's direction. I might not want to hear it but if Jax wanted me to leave I was gonna hear it from his mouth. If he choose her over me then so be it but for my own clarity I needed to hear it.

Before I got a chance to call Jax's name to wake him. Charlie hissed shit out and looked down at Jax. I followed her gaze and saw what had caused her reaction. Jax was dead to the world but had an empty pin hanging out of his arm.

I screamed. A second later I realised I was being dramatic but as the shock hit me it was my immediate response. Less than a minute later I heard footsteps running up the stairs. It felt like everything was happening in slow motion but in reality it was fast.

Levi, Chris, Nate burst into the room. Followed closely by Toby and uncle Tel. They were all looking round the room. Searching for a reason for my screaming. I noticed Nate had his trusty bat in his hand. I would of found this hilarious, had it not been for the current situation. Once they are realised there wasn't a potential threat, they took in the sight on the bed.

"Fuck sake... What the fuck is she doing here?" Tel asks after looking at Jax and turning to Charlie.

"I asked her to leave. She said it wasn't my house and I had no right. She also said that I should ask Jax and she assured me that Jax would want her to stay. Obviously that's when I saw Jax. Sorry for screaming guys" I tell them slightly sheepishly.