You're Not Even Mine to Miss [Fall Out Boy - Wattys 2014]

➽ Patrick's Prologue (Part Two).

Patrick’s Prologue (Part Two): Blackmailed myself ‘coz I ain’t got anyone else.

(April 1st, 2008)

“Pete broke up with me.”

What Donnie said kept on repeating over and over again in my head. I mean, it couldn’t be, right? That couldn’t happen. They were like the perfect couple – the couple that had found each other’s soul mate and they would end up together, get married and have kids and grow old together. Everybody expected them to be like that, and Pete promised that he would make that happen.

He made it very clear to me. He told me that he had plans for their future already. And I was pretty sure that Donnie did the same thing… and now… what had happened? What about all those plans and promises that they were talking about? Had they all been broken? Had they all gone to a waste?

For the first time in my entire life, I was fuming mad at Pete Wentz. Pete knew how much I cared for Donnie. He knew how much she meant to me. He knew, he knew, he knew. I believed in him. I had let him promise me that he would take care of Donnie, that he would be the best boyfriend (and probably the last) that she would have. I had let him take over things instead of me. I trusted him.

Gripping the phone tightly due to my anger, I hissed, “Where are you?”

I heard rain falling from the other line, and only then did I notice that it was actually raining outside. “I got stuck two blocks away from Bella Italia,” she answered, sniffing. “It’s raining hard, and there are no taxis in here anymore. And I’m freezing cold, standing here in this old bookshop in bare feet—”

“I’m going to get you,” I told her, putting my jacket on. I knew the place that she had mentioned. My anger started to dissipate, but I was still thinking of eighty-two more ways of killing Pete Wentz. I would be having a word with him. “I’ll be on my way. Just stay where you are, okay?”

“Okay,” Donnie answered in a small voice. She sounded scared. “Please hurry.”

I hung-up and immediately grabbed my car key before dashing out of my apartment room. I descended the three-story flight of steps (which felt as if I was going down the stairs forever) before I had finally reached the entrance door. I had to run to the parking lot before I was able to finally reach my car. Even though I was sweating and my jacket got soaked due to the rain, nothing stopped me from driving to Donnie. She was that important to me.

Somehow, even though I had a hard time in looking for her due to the heavy rain, I had found her standing in the shelter of an old bookshop, just like what she said. She was obviously freezing – with her arms crossed in attempt to hug herself and feel some warmth. Donnie didn’t notice me at first, but when I had gotten out of my car to lead her inside, a smile had formed on her lips.

Even though she was cold, her clothes and hair were wet of the rain, and she just got recently dumped by what she had thought was her future husband, she had the time to smile. At me, of all people. And it was the most beautiful thing that I had ever seen.

The moment I had reached her side, she had hugged me tightly. I hugged her as well, not actually minding that her backless black dress was soaked to her skin, since my jacket was just as wet as it was. I placed both of my hands at the small of her back, drawing tiny circles on her spine with my index finger which made her shiver. She then pulled away after a moment, and even with the dim lighting from the streetlight, I could still see her face. Especially those eyes of hers. The eyes that had caught my attention ever since we were freshmen.

“You should change your clothes,” I told her, gently brushing away some of her hair that had clung on her forehead. I looked down at the black dress that she was wearing. It looked really good on her, with the silk cloth clinging on her skin most especially—Focus on what’s more important than your libido, Patrick. Clearing my throat, I went on, “You might get a cold if you stay in that dress.”