Beyond Repair

3. The Institute

|Jace POV|

"Wait. Clary is coming... NOW?!?"

"Yes, Jace. I've told you that five or six times. She should be here any minute," Alec replies, exasperated.

"And you didn't bother to tell me?" I shout. How could they not tell me Clary is coming? I haven't seen her since...well, since the night she left Manhattan.

"Alec did tell you, Jace, but you've had your head in the clouds for...the last four years," Izzy says not lifting her head up from the book she's reading.

"Well-"

"Just let it go, Jace. The point is, Clary is coming home! Why aren't any of you excited about that?" Simon says, looking at Alec, then Izzy, then me.

"No one asked for your opinion, vampire boy." Simon looks back at me defiantly. Can anyone spell 'ANNOYING'?!?

The sound of the Institute door bell being wrung makes all of us stop, and me go pale. I felt myself shiver a little at the thought of seeing Clary again. She had left so quickly, and with so much anger. I'm the only one in the Institute who knows the real reason why Clary left. I couldn't tell Izzy or Alec. And if I couldn't face Alec, then you know I couldn't face Simon.

"Well. Is someone going to go get that?" Simon asks, raising an eyebrow.

"Not me," I croak. I'm suddenly having difficulty speaking. And breathing.

"I'll do it," Izzy says impatiently, dropping her book onto the couch. She gets up and walks to the button that opens the door, so that they can get on the elevator. I stare at the golden doors of the elevator, waiting for them to open, waiting to see Clary. Then they open.

I see her first. She stands in front of three other people, who each hold back slightly, but they're close enough to Clary to grab her if they need too. They're there to keep her safe from me. My heart contracts at the thought, but I do my best to stand tall.

"Hey guys," Clary says. Suddenly I see her for real. The Clary that I knew four years ago isn't the girl in front of me. The Clary I know would never be the first person to speak, ever. She looks stronger, more confident. But her smile also looks slightly forced. She's worried too. I know that I shouldn't use her weakness as my strength, but knowing that helps me.

"Clary!" Izzy says, moving to hug her best friend. "I missed you so much. We need girl support here!"

Clary laughs, and hugs Izzy back. "I'm here now. That's what's important right?"

"Yes."

Clary looks back over to the small clump that Alec, Simon, and I have formed. She looks at Simon and Alec and smiles, but doesn't even glance over at me. Oh boy. This'll be rough.

"Hi, Alec," Clary says, and awkwardly hugs Alec. They were close, but not that close. Maybe she'll look at me now... never mind. I shouldn't have expected her to just forgive me.

|Clary POV|

I pull away, and then lock eyes with Simon.

"Lewis."

"Fray."

I run over to him, and jump into his arms. Simon laughs, and grips me tightly.

"Clary. I missed you. Why didn't you tell me you were leaving?" Simon says.

"I was busy, and I didn't want you to try to talk me out of it," I say as I pull away and look him in the eyes. Damn it. I never should've left. I can just see the pain etched across his face.

"Why'd you leave?" Simon asks.

Jace didn't tell him. Honestly, I think it's for the best. If he had, Simon probably would've killed him. "Sometimes... sometimes you just need to get away from everything," I say. Out of the corner of my eye I see Jace shrink a little.

"For four years? Clary, what did you need to get away from? I thought you loved your life here as a Shadowhunter? With Jace?" Simon says, confused.

I hear Josh cough back a laugh at the last line. I look back at Josh and smile a little, and then look at Simon again. "Let's talk about this later, okay? I just got here! Let's save the questioning for a little later."

Simon nods slowly, with a confused look on his face. I pull away from him, and mutter something about needing to unpack. Sebastian elbows me, and and clears his throat, and looks distinctly over at Jace. Damn it. I knew he would do this. He wants me to go over to Jace. I glare at Sebastian, and then turn my head to look at Jace, and immediately want to look away, because it's painful just to look at him. Each time I look I see him with that girl, the girl that destroyed everything.

I walk over to Jace, and see a hopeful look flash across his face. When this happens, something inside of me snaps, and I can't do it. Not anymore. When I get to him, I hug him with my arms slung loosely around his neck, and brush my lips across his cheek. When my mouth is at the same level as his left ear, I whisper into it.

"Nothing has changed, Jace. Nothing. Everything is exactly the same as when I left four years ago. I just want you to know that when our friends do find out how you destroyed me, destroyed us, you'll have to explain everything that happened. I hope you're ready."

I pull away, smirking. "C'mon, Sebastian. You too, Mel. Josh."