Breaking The Rules

Chpt. 31

"Talk to me." He said, we were both laying back onto my wooden bed. I didn't feel like myself, I don't necessarily like it either. I feel like I've let my guard down, like I've disrespected myself.

"I can't." I barely say, tucking the tan sheet underneath my arms, making sure to cover my full body.

"I shouldn't have taken it this far, I have more respect for you, I don't know what I was thinking.." He said, "I know you regret it, but we don't ever have to bring this up again. You don't ever have to talk to me again."

"You would like that wouldn't you?" Sarcasm took over my voice.

"Like what?" He propped his body on his elbow while raising his perfe- his eyes brows at me.

"For me to never talk to you again. Noah, you don't care about me like I care about you." I turned my face away so that he couldn't see my pain. So that he couldn't see the small tear falling from my left eye, or my red cheeks.

"Bree!" He leant up, showing his boxers. Thank god he had boxers on.

"I'm trying so..damn.. hard not to like you. Because I know that I'm not going to give you what you want. I'm not going to be able to kiss you or ever hold your hand out in public. I know that I'm going to have to hide you, I know that I'm going to have to keep you a secret. So why should I let myself like you? I tried staying away from you, I've tried. If you are wondering why I haven't been talking to you, that's why.. It's not because I don't like you, it's because I can't put you through that."

"Then why in the hell did you just take my virginity?!" I said pulling the sheets and tightly wrapping them around me, I gathered my clothes together and quickly changed into the bathroom.

Whenever I came back, Noah was dressed as we'll. Just in blue jeans, and a tight blue shirt that showed all of his muscles. There for a second, I forgot why I was even mad in the first place.

"You need to leave.." I said trying my hardest not to look at him.

"Bree.." He said walking towards me. He lightly touched my fingers against his.

"Can we just talk?" Is he really asking me this right now?

"What is there to talk about?" I asked, he stepped away from me, a frown took over his face as he looked away from me.

"I'll just leave.." He said opening my door, but right whenever I thought he was going to leave, "and I'm sorry, I shouldn't have had sex with you. It was the wrong thing to do, and I apologize. We can forget that ever happened.." He walked out the door, leaving me once again speechless. One second I'm hating on him, then the next I just want to hug him forever.

My knees fell to the floor as tears straddled down the sides of my cheeks, making my eyes red and puffy. Not just because of the fact that I'm heartbroken that I could only be with the one person that I've come to love by hiding, but also because I'm mad at myself. At the time, it seemed right to loose my virginity to him, but right now I'm regretting it. Not because of who it was with, but the timing. I should have waited until I was married like I had planned. I'm only a sophomore,

and I've lost my virginity to the boy that I can never fully have.

(A/N:

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