Love or Fame?

I Choose...

*The next day*

I went to bed with a lot on my mind and when I woke up, those same things were on my mind. All I could think about was Haven, Diggy, my happiness, & most importantly, my baby. I never wanted for him to be going back and forth between parents, but that's just what's gonna happen, unless I choose to move back in with Diggy. We could try to work on things like he wants but to be honest, I don't think it's gonna get anywhere. We'll ha a great moments, but then they're all just gonna end, like always. See, with him, I'm used to it. I wouldn't be surprised. I'm done with it. I've given him millions of chances that he's just messed up and I'm done. That Lexi has changed. & last night I realized that I can't be scared to move on or else I'll never move on & I'll just be stuck here in the same position. That can't happen. I can't be living in fear. It's time I let go of that and live my life. Now that I know what I want, I know who I want. If I wanna move on from the past & pain, I have to let go of it right? Right. That's why, I choose..."yes, I'll go out with you," I replied to his question he just asked for the millionth time. "Oh my g- don't play with me. Are you serious?!" I couldn't help but laugh. "Yes, Haven. I'm serious. No games. I wanna go out with you," I heard him sigh. "Man, Lexi you don't know how happy you just made me." I could tell that he was smiling. "Um, are you free tonight," he asked. "Yeah, I'm free." "Great! I'll pick you up at 8. Is that okay?" "Yes. That's perfect," I replied. "Great. You won't regret it, Lexi. I promise." After he said that, we said our goodbyes and hung up. Now, Therese one more person I need to talk to. Diggy. After doing my hygiene routine, I got in my car and drove over to the place I once called home.

*At Diggy's house*

Since I still have the key, I opened the door and went in. "Diggy," I yelled as I shut the door. I called him a few more times as I walked around the huge house looking for him. When I got to the living room, I heard running down the steps. I turned around and saw him in just a towel. "Hey. Sorry, I was in the shower. What's up? Is everything okay? Is it the baby?" "Um, no, no we're good. I came to talk to you about something." He nodded and replied "okay, um. Lemme just get dresses real quick. I'll be right back, okay?" I nodded & said "yeah." I took a seat on the couch and waited for him to get back. While I did that, I checked my phone to see that I have a text from Haven.

*Text Convo*

Haven: hey beautiful, I just wanted to tell you to have a great day. I was so excited I didn't even say that today. & I'm looking forward to our date tonight! ;)

Haven always told me to have a great day. Whether it was a phone call, or text, he always said it.

Me: thank you Haven. I'm really excited too! :) but enjoy your day!

Haven: oh I will! I'll be thinking of you all day ;-*

He had me smiling a little.

Me: awww who's the sweetest?

Haven: Lexi & Havennnnn ;p *sends a ratchet ass pic of us*

Me: lol! We stylin on em ;) #ThugLife #RatchetAssHell

Haven: always! & lmao but #WeStillCutrTho #CantEvenLie #LexiAndHavenThugTeam

Me: thug team? Really?! Lmao

Haven: gangstaaazzzz babyyyy #GetWitTheHustle #TheyAintOnOurLevel

I was gonna reply to that when I heard Diggy say something. "Who got you smiling like that?" I looked up & he was walking over to me. As soon as he got to where I was, he hugged and sat next to me. "So, what's up," he asked. He was looking at his phone when he asked me that. "So I needed to talk to you about something," I replied waiting for him to look at me. "Mhm. & what's that?" He still had his eyes glued to his phone and I had mine glued to him. "Is it important," I asked referring to whatever he was looking at. "What?" "Whatever your doing on your phone?" He looked up at me, shook his head, then looked down at his phone again. "Nah, not really. Spin said hi by the way." I was getting impatient with this so I took his phone and put it beside me. "We'll this is important," I said a bit upset. Damn, I really need to at least try to control my mood swings. I been getting upset with people a lot lately for some dumb shit, then ended up crying after yelling at them. Being pregnant is both good and bad. I just can't wait to get him out of me.