By Any Other Name

C.8

After a long night of next to no sleeping after that tea, I locked my door, put on some music from my laptop, and snuck out through the window, facepaint on, knife in pocket.

I wandered to a known domestic abusers' home, broke in and killed him in cold blood, then saw home drugs lying around, and decided what the hell, mine now.

I went out a back door and to an alley, where I wandered and soon found some druggies.

"Hey." I called and they looked over. "You all looking to buy?" I asked and took the bag of coke from my pocket.

"How much?" Some guy asked.

"How bad do you want it?" I smirked and he shoved a few hundred bills in my hands. "That'll do it." I said and tossed the bag to him, pocketing the money and walking away.

I found one more sucker to kill, which I caught undressing a poor girl, and cut his throat while yanking the girl to my side. I helped dress her as he bled out, then checked for his pulse every once in a while. When he finally stopped moving and had no pulse, I walked the girl to a police station, and left her as she walked inside.

I snuck back to HQ and made it back in my window, closing it and wiping little droplets of blood off me. I stopped my music and shed a few layers as well, getting comfy. I lied back on my bed as I drank a beer, then looked at it and then my door, then back at the can and chugged the rest of it.

I didn't come out of my room the rest of the day, and fell back asleep when the sun went down.

I woke up panting, and squeezing the sides of my head, my eyes shut tight as tears rolled down my cheeks.

"Fuck!" I swore and grabbed a few cans of beer, deciding I couldn't be in this room any longer.

So I sat at the kitchen table, staring down as I drank can after can, slowly becoming intoxicated and tipsy.

L walked in and stood beside me, looking at the three empty cans on the table, and the fourth one I was drinking. "How long have you been here?" He asked and I looked over for the time, seeing it was one forty five in the morning.

"Hour or so. Maybe longer." I sighed, keeping my head down.

He put his fingers under my face and lifted it, then wiped tears from my cheeks. "Another dream?" He asked and I nodded, then he took a seat. "You can talk to me about it... if you'd like." He offered.

"You wouldn't understand..." I shook my head, and my intoxicated self started to babble. "Why don't you remember who I am? It would be so much easier if you just recognised me!"

"I'm trying, Rosie. Okay? I really am." He said, leaning forward a little, and I only sniffed and hung my head.

"I really want to tell you, too. Just get it over with..."

"Why don't you?" L asked.

"Because then you'll hate me." I cried a little more. "I don't want you to hate me, L. You can't hate me." My shoulders shook as I sobbed. I would die if he hated me.

L was quiet for a long time, just letting me cry. "You should really get to bed. I'll walk you to your room." He said and stood, taking my hands and standing me up.

"No! I can't." I said and he looked confused. "I can't be in there for a while..." I mumbled and he just nodded.

"Alright. Well..." he hummed and started to lead me to the main room, and he took a blanket and made me sit on the couch beside him, then pushed me down so I lied down, and put the blanket over me.

"Sleep." He said and went to sit in front of the monitor, and I yawned at his command, felt my eyes filling with sleepy tears, and soon closed them.

With Lawliet near me, I had a feeling he would fight my nightmares away as I slept, even if he didn't know he was doing it.