Best Friends Brother

Chapter 33 - why now

A/n I'm not saying cutting is the answer this chapter is about it skip this chapter if you don't like it
I woke up to my alarm it was 4:00 am I wasn't going to bother trying to get back to sleep because it was pointless i went on my recent vlog checked the comments

Their was so many hate comments usually I wouldn't care but they really got to me

User7: I'm glad I got the shoutout I'm not a fan it's just gives me a bit more popularity

I know that's not really hate but that gets me I taught my self  to not react to hate I used to 3 years ago and it hit me bad I wouldn't eat I would hurt myself

I try washing those thoughts out my head but they just won't go away I try distracting myself by messaging people I already have a message from Logan which he sent yesterday

To Ariana:
Hey babe sorry I had to go to set

I thought this would help but I just don't want to talk to him he hasn't done anything what's wrong with me why are they getting to me

The words 'fat' 'ugly' 'whore' swirled round my head making me collapse into my pillow sobbing

Why now after all those years it effects me know

I must of fell asleep again but I didn't notice jake come in and shoot the merch gun

Jake: good morning

Ariana: morning

Jake: are you alright

Ariana: I'm fine

Jake left I locked my door the only person who knew my code was Jake which I wish he didn't and Tessa I think I might of told Erica and maybe Emilio

I jumped in the shower once I finished I got changed into some comfy clothes

I looked in the mirror I look fat I look ugly why did I thing I was decent

My so called fans did this to me I felt really self conscious so I put on Logan's jumper to cover most of my body