Lessons of Love

No Shame

After about an hour and a half of roaming throughout the city we went back to my house, deciding it was not only getting really late - or early, but we were both extremely exhausted. We mostly felt the fatigue hit us when we arrived at my driveway. I was worried for Zayn, I didn't want him to get into an accident, so I did what I thought what was most logical with my tired mind.

"Zayn? Do you just want to stay? I know you're tired..." oh God, I sounded awkward. I am sure of it.

"Are you sure?" He asked me, his voice sounded raspy. I only nodded as I got off of his bike and started walking to the front door.

"Come on Malik." I said over my shoulder. From the corner of my eyes I saw his him rub his face as he got off the bike, almost tripping. Maybe I am not the only one who has two left feet after all. I let out a chuckle as I saw him try to compose himself as he walked towards the door.

"You okay Malik? I almost saw you fall there." Oh I wanted to laugh so bad now as I saw his cheeks start to heat up slightly from embarrassment.

"I just want to sleep." Me too, me too Malik. I pushed the door open, trying to make as little noise as possible. I didn't want to wake my mom up, mostly because I would have to explain to her where I was and why Zayn is here, and I am not in the mood for answering questions.

I felt my body being lifted from the ground and I felt something warm against my ear. I looked up, puzzled by what Zayn was doing but I decided not to question it as I nuzzled myself into his chest. I was worried at first as we started going up the stairs that I would be too heavy for him. But soon enough I felt his muscles tense up and lift me higher as we got to the top, he was trying to adjust my body to his. I started to feel myself drift off in his arms; his arms that not only did I feel safe and secure in them, but I also felt as ease - like it was where I belonged.

In this moment, I couldn't help but think I did.

I heard the door creak, and I just hoped to God it wasn't so loud to the point where my mom heard it. Soon enough I was being laid on, and felt my jacket and my worn out boots being taken off by Zayn. I slightly smiled by this action, it showed he cared about how comfortable I felt. I tried opening my eyes, and when I did, I saw a confused Zayn with his jacket and shoes in hand. I was guessing he didn't know where exactly to put them, he sighed while shrugging his shoulder placing them on the floor next to the bed. I wanted to let out another chuckle, but I couldn't, I was too tired to do anything but keep my eyes open. He started making his way towards my side of the bed where he had placed me.

I thought he was just going to go to bed, but I felt a slight dip on my side of the bed but I soon shifted so that I was facing the wall and laying on my side. Seconds later I felt his soft lips place a kiss on my forehead, with it, a muffled goodnight Lilith. I felt something warm, but I didn't know if it was coming from the blankets that he tucked me in, or if it was coming from all these simple-kind gestures that Zayn did. Maybe it was the blankets. Sigh.

I was also expecting him to wrap his arm around my waist, but he didn't. I wasn't disappointed by this, if anything it showed that he really wanted to take this slow, right? The only heat I felt from him, was the heat radiating off of his back and onto my own as we faced separate directions.

Thoughts and unanswered questions clouded my mind, but soon started slipping away from me as I felt my eyelids become heavier and heavier. This time, it wasn't darkness that was enclosing me, but it was something warmer, less darker. Could this mean something? The possibilities were endless, but I couldn't think of any of them as I drifted off into a peaceful sleep.

I was dreaming of nothing, it was relaxing really. Just to feel free in my brain and not have to picture out one image, but picture out more. Did that even make sense? I hope it did, I mean it's just my conscious speaking and thinking for me right now.