Wattpad Trolls Unmasked

Where The Hell Are You From?

I am aware that there are many nationalities on Wattpad writing and reading on a daily basis, and I find this fascinating and worldly. To communicate with someone from another country that would never present itself normally is intriguing to me.

I have followers from India, Africa, China, and so many more, that my mind is overwhelmed and amazed at times. What a wonderful world we live in that we can speak freely without judgment and subjugation.

I have rules that I follow when socializing with my mysterious counterparts. I do not judge, I do not presume to know the different lifestyles of what is foreign to me, and I absolutely would never correct them when they create a saga in a language that is not my primary.

So, enough of the niceties. What? Did you think that for once I was being considerate? Obviously, you don't know me well enough. I may start off nice or possibly like a freshly castrated bull, but I will always end a chapter with a sweet kiss (Yes, I may have my pants around my ankles and bending over at the time, but a kiss all the same).

Like a good girl, I finish my reads in the infamous book clubs that I have joined yet sometimes this is a tedious task. I find it difficult to leave an engaging, meaningful, heartfelt comment at the end of some chapters when all I want to do is scream and beat my head against a wall.

Answer me a question. Have you ever read a book written by a person that is not from your country, and they completely have the wrong idea about your great nation? Sadly, I have had to read more than a few.

When writing your great novel, would you not investigate and nurture your mind with true facts before coming to wrong conclusions and placing them into print. Before hitting that publish icon should you make sure your story depicts the correct information of the unknown land where you place your characters?

A few months ago, I was assigned a book that continues to burn within my mind and smolders there waiting to spark to life again. Usually, this would be a good thing, but no, it is disturbing. The book depicted two American, teenage cousins that were madly in love and ended up "making love." After swallowing the bitter contents of my stomach back down, I had no idea what to write as my book club review (I love how you were able to discretely remove the remorse and embarrassment that each character was undoubtedly feeling while they took the train to Tuna Town?).

Discretely, I glanced through the comments made by others and was amazed that they all approved with their bawdy statements of acceptance. Of course, I then went to all of their home pages and discovered the truth that laid within their quickly written depictions of themselves. Not a single one, including the author, was from the country that she wrote about in such detail.

Listen, in this country we may be more accepting than most. We have come to accept sexualities of many kinds, and our melting pot is overflowing. Incest is not one of them, freaks; we do not fuck our cousins! If this is something that is done in other nations, then place your characters there. We tend to veer away from activities that may cause a three-headed bun in the oven.

Another great work of art that haunts me is one of an American child that is beat with a belt in a classroom full of other children and another teacher. This activity is never reported, and when the innocent character arrives home with the deep cuts and bruises across her back, the father tortures her further and starves her due to his embarrassment of "her" behavior. Again, I checked the dreamer of this masterpiece out, and voila, she is not from the country that she writes about so diligently.

Please, turd burgers, I know teachers, principles, and administrators in my country's school systems and this would never happen. If you're getting your ass beat in your country, keep it there. There are idiots out there that believe the shit that fascinates you. I have no problem with you writing about it but make it believable, and place it somewhere where it actually could happen.

Here is one more. A sex club and a nightclub are two separate things entirely, you rejects from Romper Room. Get your shit right before some idiot comes into my country, walks into a club and starts peeling off her dress. Although, she may achieve some attention it may also award her with some time in the slammer. Now, that is a place that you may get the "Sex Club" experience you crave. Big Bertha will be waiting for you.

There is a multitude of books and topics that I could hit you with, yet I fear that vomiting too much within one day can cause ulcers and gastrointestinal bleeding.

Just one more thing before I depart and this goes to everyone. Do not try to correct grammar in a language that is not your primary language. If you are judging a contest, you should only judge the books written in your firsthand dialect.

Again, I love that we have freedom of speech and press in this country, but I hate to see any nation depicted as something that it is not ( This goes for all, not just mine). While reading, always remember to take everything with a grain of salt (I carry a salt shaker in my purse and still have problems with my own advice). Let's keep in real, Wattpaders.