Swords of the Soul

Shira's Letter To Dealan

The night was cold and was only lit by the light of the moon. Virtual reality was beautiful, even if it was deadly in this world.
Dealan sat at his desk silently, leaning back in his wooden chair. He stared up and out his window at the moon and stars. He imagined them dancing together in the sky, and when one slipped and fell, that led to a shooting star. He smiles to himself, eyes calm and nort worried in the slightest. He finally decided to look at his messages inbox and see how many times I, Shiramane, had messaged him again. Nothing since the last time he checked. He closed his eyes and leaned his head back, growing tired. "Shira..." he whispered, face flashing across his mind. He opened his eyes and noticed a blinking icon in a corner of his inbox. Upon selecting it, he was brought to a new screen. That new screen held one new message, or one new piece of mail.

Dear Dealan
From: Shiramane

His eyes stared at the name and he became unable to think clearly. His mind had gone numb. "Dear... Dealan?" I had never said something like that before. He tapped on the mail and it opened, bringing him to the conclusion that this actually was a piece of mail I had written. For him.
He took a deep breath, closed and opened his eyes, and began to read.

Dear Dealan,
    I think it's time to explain some things. I won't be able to explain everything until this game is over, so I hope you accept the apology I am giving...
    Where should I start? Hm. Well, I'm not who you think I am.

That alone made his face grow pale. He had no idea what I had meant. If I had meant my name, well then of course I wasn't who he thought I was. I wasn't born as Shiramane.
But that's not what I had meant in this letter.

     What I mean by that... I'm not what I look like IRL. And I don't just mean the eyes.
     My father worked with Akihiko Kayaba, so I can do things many others cannot.
     But of course, even I can't leave this game. That is something even I haven't been granted. For if I had... it wouldn't be fair, would it? I suppose not.
     I am smart for my age. I am probably frail by now, most likely from my time in the hospital while stuck in Aincrad right now.
     I am like most people; I want to go home. But we don't always get what we want.
     Like love. Which leads me into another topic. Love.
     I'm not sure if I like you, Dealan. I am... "unable" to feel emotions that way. I am "unable" to feel romantic ferlings for someone. I can feel love for friends and family and favorite items... but not for another human being. I do not feel the want or need to date someone or have children with someone. I've given up, you see.
      For the longest time, I've been an outcast; ignored. Only people online can understand me and understand what I mean by this. I know I'm not alone... even if you may not be like this.
     Which, if you like me and have feelings for me, you most likely are not. I believe you are like a regular person who likes a girl.
      I said I am smart for my age. How old are you? I wonder if I know you from somewhere... from another game? I might have crossed paths with you before. I have done so with many other people.
      My friend Diabel was one of them.

There it was again - Diabel.
I'd mentioned his name so much and it had started to strike so many questions in Dealan's head.
Maybe this letter would explain things.
Or not.

       Diabel is another story - for another time.

He sighed. He continued reading.

       I was happy when I was offered the chance by my father and Akihiko to try the Beta of Sword Art Online.
      Yes. I am a Beta Tester. And slight cheater.
      I am a Beater.
      I know people who are Beaters.
      We aren't like what some people think. But there are some of us... some of us just like the Hazy Lilacs.
      Our Guild.
      I've never actually used our name before... a member of the former Hazy Lilacs Guild. It sounds kinda nice. What do you think?
      Alixen keeps bugging me. I have our Guild members' memories and personalities saved to my Nerv Gear memory. It's not fun, but it's not awful either.
      I have them and they have me. And you have us.
     Will you get this letter? Will you answer me back to it? Probably not. You'll probably go about your life remaining hidden. You're pretending to be a dying flame, Dealan; something you're not.
     Be safe.
     I'm going to help end Aincrad.
     I'm going to set us all free.

What the next line was, well, it was something he was not prepared for.

     I am going to kill Akihiko Kayaba, with my father not far behind. They will die at each others' side as the monsters I know they are.
  -Shiramane.

Dealan leaned back in his chair, slightly stunned. He couldn't believe what he just read.
"Sh... Shira?" He spoke aloud to himself. "Shira... be safe." He hugged himself, remembering his Guild members. He began shaking from the pain. "... Shiramane..."