Growth | z.m.

Chapter 28

Eve's POV

Staying in Bradford was definitely beneficial to me because I needed the time to heal and feel love. Tricia was the mother I needed in a time like this. She made sure I had everything I could possibly need, while tending to Aiden and Zayn, and her own husband and daughters.

Lucky for us, no one bothered us here. There was no press waiting outside, no paparazzi hiding in the bushes. Maybe it was because they didn't know where we were, but I'd like to think that it was because the people behind the cameras, microphones, and notebooks, were real humans that cared about others in the grand scheme of things.

We had stayed for three nights so far, and I stayed in bed for most of the time every day. I only got up out of bed because I didn't want to be rude. I laid in bed without a pillow under my head. I couldn't get myself to sleep with one lately.

"Hey baby." Zayn greeted me as he got into bed. I hadn't even noticed him come in. His bare chest was skinnier than usual. How could I expect him to have an appetite when I couldn't stomach much myself?

"Hi." I acknowledged him and allowed his arms to move my dead weight closer to him. His skin was cold, but smooth.

"You're really warm." He said. "Do you have a fever?"

"I don't know." I said simply. It was better than telling him the truth.

I was tired.

I didn't care.

Zayn brought the back of his hand to my forehead. "I'll go get a thermometer."

"No." I breathed. "It doesn't matter. It won't make it go away."

"I need to know if I should get you some medicine. I can't have you sick."

"Just stay with me. I don't want to be left alone. If I'm sick, hold me until I'm well. If I'm depressed, talk to me until I'm happy. No chemical is going to make me feel better. You are."

And he didn't say anything more. He held me until I fell asleep. And I dreamed not of what I'd lost but what I still had.

My dreams took me back to our house in London. We were all in the garden in the back, Alfie sniffing around to find a place to have a wee. We were all happy and relaxed which didn't seem normal these days.

I giggled as I watched Aiden attempt to do a somersault, making faces in frustration as he tried to get his legs to go over his head.

"I can't do it." He sighed.

"Yes you can, honey." I encouraged him. "You can do anything you put your mind to."

"Even flying?" He asked.

"Maybe." I shrugged.

"Of course you can." Zayn jumped in. "Nothing is impossible."

"Nothing?" Aiden seemed absolutely dumbfounded by this statement.

"Nothing, except maybe getting your daddy to do the washing up." I laughed at Zayn as his smile turned into a playful frown.

"Eve..." He narrowed his eyes at me before attacking me with his wiggly fingers, tickling me until I begged for him to stop because I was completely out of breath.

And then everything froze completely. It was like someone had a time travel watch and pressed pause. I couldn't move, I couldn't breathe, I couldn't-

I jolted awake sweating. My clothes stuck to me like I had just jumped into a pool, and my hair was wet. It felt like I couldn't even hold myself up with my arms. I couldn't think of the last time I felt so incredibly weak. At least when I had my miscarriage I had adrenaline. I was angry and scared when Amelia Luna died. This was nothing like that.