The ups and downs

Well...

*pov of Daisy*
My jaw dropped, how do I respond to that? All I heard was my mouth farm the words," will I get payed cuz I'm going to school, college, and I need to save for it." "Of course you will, and if you designe merch and stuff you get paid more for it. But if you need help with college I don't mind helping you." Oliver smiled at me. Should I do it? Who do I have here for me? My friends, my boyfriend; if they still wanted to know me.

"Why not then! You got yourselves a new merch girl! And I can draw so maybe designer too." I shook my head with some confidence. The guys cheered and started to pull me into a group hug. A sweaty but happy group hug.

I went home after being told where I should meet them and packed everything I'd be needing. Not that I had much left as I sold all the furniture and everything that wasn't a basic necessity. Later I learned the couple bought the house filled with harmful memories. Hopefully they will be happy. And getting the cash from it was pretty good too.

I met the guys at the restaurant and they all had ordered drinks and were having a grand time. I'd hate to impose on them, ugh why must I be so awkward. "Hey, I packed!" "Want a metal?" Matt N questioned jokingly. My smile dropped and all the guys laughed. "No worries he's just an arse. He's joking with you love!" Jordan said putting an arm around me. I smiled.

Soon it was time to go and start to the next city, Boston. I took one last look at the place I spent merely a year of my life in. A place where I thought would be better. It was, well some parts. I shed a tear, for I knew I wouldn't come back. I shed a tear for the relationships I undoubtedly fucked up. I shed a tear for the innocence I had lost here. I shed a tear for it all.

"Are you sure you want to do this? You can turn back, we won't judge you." I wiped away that tear and turned around to see a concerned Lee. "Oh no, I'm happy to leave here. Some bad memories lie here." He nodded," well then we best be on our way." I went and sat down on a bench in the bus.

I hadn't realized I'd fallen asleep until I was being shaken by a tired looking Oliver. "Hey, love, there's a bunk you can sleep in. It's more comfortable than sleeping on a bench. It's mine but it's fine I'll take the couch." I looked at him and blinked trying to process what he said," what? No no. It's your bed I'm fine here. Plus you need the sleep, you got a concert tomorrow." I smiled.

"Well you can sleep with me, I won't try anything don't worry." I thought about it and decided why not?"are you sure?" "Yeah, I wouldn't want you to be cranky tomorrow." He smiled," okay, thank you." He waved me off and I went to sleep in his bed that night.

I started having a dream, a terrible dream. My well I guess ex was screaming my name. Like he was in pain and I was the only person who could help him. I couldn't help though, I was chained up or something. He kept screaming and I kept crying. Then my friends came up to me and surrounded me," you are so selfish. You don't deserve love. You deserve nothing. Nothing other than a slow painful death." I shook my head," stop please stop! I didn't do anything to you! I left because I felt alone and wanted a fresh start!" They all laughed, soon Oliver joined them. "I never loved you, I just wanted to fuck you." He said that hurt. "We mine as well just kill her guys. She doesn't deserve to breath, she doesn't deserve anything." Suddenly Melanie pulled out a knife and stabbed me.

I woke up screaming and fell out of the bunk and ran into a wall. I hyperventilated and was crying. What the fuck was that? My guilt.

Oliver jumped out of his bed and wrapped his arms around me," it's okay love. It was just a dream, shh. It's okay." Oli started to sing to me putting me at ease. But when I closed my eyes I kept seeing all my old friends.

I couldn't escape this, I woke up and noticed I was magically back in bed. Like a child who fell asleep in one place and woke in bed. I checked the time, 6:00 am. Not bad, mine as well go make coffee or something for they guys. Maybe work on some designs.

The bus was parked outside of a breakfast place. I walked in and ordered two boxes of coffee and a dozen donuts. Hopefully they'll appreciate it.

I put down the coffee and donuts. I poured myself a cup and began to doodle.

I ended up with a drawing that looked like the guys with Bring Me The Horizon above them. It looked metal but also had some sobering effect to it. I added color and decided it was half way decent.

The first to wake up was Jordan who greeted me with a smile. "Are these for us? How sweet of you. Do you need money for it?" I shook my head," it's on me. Enjoy!" I smiled and he grabbed a donut and sat next to me. "What do we have here?" He took the paper and stared at the picture," wow, you're good. These guys look just like us. How did you draw it?" I shrugged.

"Well sometimes to escape myself I would just draw. Sometimes my drawings are realistic other times they look like cartoons. It just depends on how I feel." I smiled and flipped to a blank page. "If you don't mind I'm going to draw another design, but we can still talk."

With that I began to draw a more in detail and realistic drawing. It was of a little girl drawing the flower of life. I draw more realistic the sadder I get I learned.