Safe (Lams)

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Trigger Warning: Death and Mentions of Rape

Alex looked across the table at John who was eating quickly, again, that's how it's been for months now. Alex would make food and John would scarf it down before running to their room but when Alex went to get into bed John would scoot as far away from Alex as possible sometimes even going as far as getting up and leaving the room.

He heard a noise and looked at John hopeful that John has started a conversation but he paled when he realized it was really because John was choking. Quickly he got up and ran across the table, grabbing John and balling his fist up, pushing against his diaphragm and up against his chest until John coughed the food up before collapsing, Alex caught him as he knew doing that sometimes made people faint.

He sighed and swept John off of his feet before carrying him to a sofa and setting him down, leaving him there to recover as he piled plates and cups up and carrying them to the kitchen where he did the dishes.

He was hurt, undeniable hurt, he loved John with everything he had but he was starting to think John didn't feel the same for him any longer. He wanted to talk things out, to sit down with John and discuss what was wrong, but every time he tried John just got up and left him. Every single time. He loved him, he did, but he didn't want to force John to stay in a relationship if he didn't want to be in one any longer.

Alex finished the dishes and went into the living room to check on John and saw he was shaking and crying in his sleep so he ran over and shook his boyfriend, "John! Wake up!" He said and when John did he pushed Alex off and screamed as Alex hit the floor and just stared at him, "Dude what the fuck?!" He finally let out.

John rubbed his eyes and looked down, "Sorry I should-I don't-I've got to-" He got up and tried to take off down the hallway and to the door but Alex grabbed his hand and forced him back even as John struggled.

"No! Look at me-look at me please," He hated how his voice broke but he bit it back as he forced his anger back, "For months and months and months and months you've left me alone!" Alex yelled, "There wasn't any reason you just left me! If you don't love me anymore just let me know! Just leave me instead of filling me with false hope constantly!" He let go of John's wrist making John fall to the ground.

For a moment John stayed there and looked down. Alex went to open his mouth to say more but John mumbled something before looking at Alex and realized he didn't hear so he got up and screamed in Alex's face something that made him stop and take a step back, "W-What?" He looked John over and then made a move to hug him but stopped himself but John launched himself into him so he wrapped his arms around him, "It-It's okay..."

John shook his head, "It-It's not I'm s-so sorry." He carefully put his arms around Alex, "I should have told you I-I should-I didn't-I um-I just-I-"

"Shh, John," Alex pet his hair to try and calm him down, "Who was it?" he felt his anger rise again though this time it was thankfully not aimed at John in any way, "Was it a man or-or a woman? What did they look like? What were they wearing? I-I'll fucking gouge out their eyes John I-I swear I'm going to keep-I'm supposed to keep you safe dammit!" His anger dissolved into sadness as he held John even tighter and cried silently knowing John was doing the same, "I'm supposed to keep you safe and I didn't."

John sobbed louder into his shoulder and Alex collapsed onto the ground with him, keeping his arms securely around him and planning to never let go as both men cried, "I'm going to-to find them and hurt them r-real bad for you." Alex said and tangled his fingers in John's hair.

John shook his head and looked at Alex who looked back while his heart broke at seeing John look so broken, "I-It was James-James Reynolds." He said quietly, "B-Because I told him I-I was going to help his wife get a divorce because he-he does it to her too-oo and he said he was-s going to show me that sh-she was his and so am I..."

Alex put John's head against his chest so he couldn't see the intense anger spreading through his body as he glared at the opposite wall, "You're not his," He said through gritted teeth, "You're mine and you're your own person as well." He rocked John back and forth like that until he fell asleep again.

Alex picked him up again and carried him to their room where he carefully put him down on the bed and kissed his forehead before whispering, "Sleep well love, I'll be back soon." He grabbed his black powder rifle and loaded it before strapping it to his back and tying his attachable bayonet to his belt, heading out to go hunting for assholes.

He arrived and saw a woman laying down on her side, trying to huddle with her red dress to keep warm and he hurried over, "Mrs. Reynolds?" He asked and she looked at him with bruised eyes and a bloodied nose as she nodded once, "Stay right here, I was never here." She nodded again and he went inside.

Once inside Alex realized the closeness meant he couldn't fire his weapon without injuring his own eyesight so he felt glad that his military life had drilled into his head the need to remember to carry a bayonet as he clipped it to the front of his gun and searched for the man who dared hurt his beloved.

He stepped on a floor panel causing it to squeak and an angry man's voice to yell for a Maria, telling her to get outside. Alex assumed Maria was Mrs. Reynolds and hid behind the opposite corner for this James Reynolds to walk down the hallway. Immediately when he saw him Alex ran his sharp metal spike through his heart and glared with no sympathy as he crumbled.

Right before the light left his eyes Alex whispered, "This is for John you sick fuck." With that, he slid off of his bayonet and Alex wiped the blood off on James's sleeve.

He felt somebody hug his leg and he looked down, surprised to see a small girl with curly brown hair, "Thank you for getting rid of the bad mans." She said and Alex ruffled her hair in confusion before putting the dots together.

"Your mommy is outside, tell her she can come in," Alex said, as soon as the small girl ran to get her mother Alex slipped out and went home, cleaning his weapon and hanging it back up.

Alex entered his bedroom and smiled at the frame of John, breathing slowly in his deep sleep as Alex stripped before climbing into bed next to him and hugging him, kissing the top of his head and whispered, "I'll always keep you safe."

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