The Catalyst (GirlXGirl)

Chp. 65 "Friendly Advice"

Chp. 65 “Friendly Advice”

I was staring into Avery’s eyes, searching for some type of response, but she wouldn’t give me anything. Her face said it all though, and she was mortified as her eyes switched from me to Taylor who was standing behind me.

I whispered, “Avery please let me explain.”

She turned down the hall, heading away from me as I followed her, forgetting completely about Taylor. My heart felt as if it was about to explode inside my chest, and the more I chased after Avery the more I realized how bad I had fucked up.

I pleaded, “Avery, please!”

She continued down the hall, away from me, as if she was attempting to run from the pain I had wrapped around me. I needed to explain, and I needed to apologize, but she was refusing to respond to me, as if I didn’t exist.

I leaned forward, grabbing her hand and spinning her around, “Avery please listen to me, it’s not-”

“It’s not what, Andy? It’s not what it looks like? Is that what you’re going to tell me?”

Her eyes were blood-shot, and there were tears rimming her eyes as she struggled to keep them from falling down her face. She was broken, I could see it, and I had absolutely no idea how to fix this situation. I could lie to her, I could lie my ass off, but I’m positive that would only result in a more negative way.

She didn’t pull her hand away from me as I continued to hold it, which I took as a good sign, but she was still hurt. I whispered, “Please… it’s not, ok?”

She tilted her head, and this time a tear rolled silently down her face, “You have her lipstick on your neck.”

I felt my heart sink to my stomach, as if I had been stabbed in the heart by her words. They were so broken, and so filled with hate and betrayal, and I knew she was too far gone for me to reach.

I continued to plead, “Avery, I-”

“Save it,” she pulled her hand from mine as she stepped away from me, “I need to be alone.”

I watched as her heart broke in front of me, and she wanted nothing to do with me. I wanted nothing to do with me, simply because I felt completely disgusted with myself for allowing myself to fuck up.

I dropped my hands to my sides as I nodded in defeat, “Ok.”

She turned away from me, disappearing around the corner as I stood there in the empty hallway alone. What had I done? Why the hell did I kiss Taylor? What had possessed me to do that?

I leaned against the cold wall, sinking down to my knees as I tried to stop the aching in my chest that was becoming unbearable. I closed my eyes, attempting to push the sadness far back into my heart as if that would help it somehow disappear. I had completely fucked up and I had no idea how to go about fixing it. I knew Avery needed time away from me, I knew she was hurt, but what if she decided to leave?