Life is Hell

Chapter Twenty Seven - Morning After

"Clare!" Mom yelled for the billionth time by now. I groaned and turned around. "Guess you aren't made for the rebellious lifestyle sista" Chloe said and I opened my eyes "Fuck off Chloe" "Or maybe I was wrong" She added. "How aren't you tired the morning after?" "I medicate" She replied. "Not getting high Chloe" I told her and sat up. "You look like shit" "Thanks a lot. I feel so loved" "Then get up and ready. By the way, the Preshit is sitting downstairs with mom" "Say what now?!" I asked, jumping out of bed. "Get out!" I yelled and pushed her out, getting ready for school myself. I think I chose my edgiest outfit yet.

"Urgh, Chloe was right... I do look like a zombie" I said and hurried to the bathroom, grabbing my mom's make up to cover the bags beneath my eyes. "Guess this is as good as it gets" I said, went to my room and got my phone, then hurried downstairs where mom was showing Nathan some old childhood photos of Chloe and I, since there were only photos of us together since we were joined by the hip. "Mom, are you done embarrassing me?" I said as I sat down next to Nate.

"Wow, you look different" Nathan said as he saw me. "Didn't want to go to school looking like a zombie" I told him, my mom's eyes on me. "But he's right, you don't look like you" He said. "Chill, I won't use your make up anymore" I said. "It's okay, I can buy you your own when I'm in town" She said. "Don't bother. I'll just take a sleeping pill tonight and I won't need it" I said and got up, grabbing Nathan's arm. "A word please!" Mom said strict. "Fine" I said and walked into the garage followed by her. Nathan didn't need to hear any of that.

"What has gotten into you!?" She asked me "This isn't the Clare I know!" "And what Clare do you know exactly? If it's not this one and not the one I was before. What Clare did you know?" "I don't know what's going on here, but why are you turning into your sister?" "Maybe I was like her all along, you just didn't realize it because you were so damn blinded by your dickhead boyfriend" I snapped at her. "That's it! You are grounded young lady!" Mom snapped at me. "I've got to come home first, don't I?" I asked her in return. "Where will you go? The sketchy guy you been having dinner with at the diner!?" She asked. "Yeah, why not! At least he cares about me, other than you!" "I do care" She replied. "Not seeing any of that now. Now if you would excuse me, I need to go to school" I said, turned around and left the garage "Let's go Nate!" I said and pulled him with me.

"What's going on with you?" Nathan asked, I could hear the worry in his voice. "Sadness didn't bring me anywhere! I honestly don't care anymore! I don't give a shit about what happens to me, I could walk in front of a train and I wouldn't care!" I said and Nathan stopped me and made me face him. "Clare, this can't be what you are really thinking" He said. "It is Nathan! My dad was sweet and nice all the time, look where it got him. Into a box in the ground, why shouldn't I follow?" I asked him. "Because it's not your time yet! This is your depression speaking!" "Yeah, a depression no one cares about!" I said and walked ahead. "I do care, I just don't know what to do!" Nate said and I turned around to him "I know" I said in my usual sweet voice "But I'm hoping mom will realize that she can't continue like this, otherwise she can pay for a grave right next to my dad" I said and walked ahead.

"I'll try helping you. In fact I'll tell you something I told no one before. I'm in therapy and I can take you with me to a session" "That's nice, but I can't afford that. My family can't afford that!" "Then I'll pay. I want you to get better!" "And you think your dad will just allowed that?!" I asked him, feeling how I got upset again. "My money, my decision!" He said and grabbed my hands "You just have to hold on until next week and try not to put any shit" He said and I sighed "You know I don't do drugs or alcohol. Would be stupid in my situation. I'm already unpredictable"  "I know Clare, I'll try everything to help you" He said and wrapped his arms around me. "Let's just get to school, alright? Don't need more trouble" I said, let go off him and walked towards the bus station since Nathan didn't come with his car today.

"Clare, wait up!" Nathan called after me while I stormed off. "Clare!" Nathan yelled after me, but I still didn't listen. I just wanted to get the fuck out off here. "What is it with people trying to control me!?" I asked myself and ran towards the parking lot. I didn't notice someone was running after me. Not until I leaned against the stone wall and saw her. Rachel. "What?" I asked her, snapping. "What is going on with you?!" She asked. "Why is everyone asking me that today?" I replied "I'm so sick of it!"

"Because you aren't the Clare that everyone knows" She replied, moving closer to me. "Maybe this was the me I was always supposed to be" I said, giving her something to think about. "Also, I might have found out something or am close to finding something out" I told her. "Yes?" She asked, lifting her head. "A dangerous guy knows her and might be our ticket to find out about Sera, but I need to do a job for him" "Are you going to?" She asked. "I don't know yet, depends on your decision" I said, crossing my arms in front of my chest. "You're not getting into danger for me!" "But you want to know about her" I said to her. "That's why we're going together" Rachel said and I groaned "Rachel, I said I'll help you and that is how I will help you!" "I'm not letting you get yourself into danger! It's either with me or not at all!" She said and I sighed "Fine!"

I got my phone out and the card Damon gave me, then called him. "I'll accept with one condition" I said. "What? The little fucker has demands now?" He asked. "I'm a 15 year old girl, you don't really think I would do this alone, do you? How am I supposed to stand up against shitasses like you alone!?" I asked. "Fine, is your friend trustworthy?" "I trust her with my life" I said while looking at her. "Alright, I'll text you the info" He said and hung up. "Everything alright?" She asked and I walked towards her "Everything went well. But there is probably one thing you should know. This won't be legal. Those are really bag guys. When people think Frank is bad, they haven't met him yet" "I knew that from the start Clare" She said and hugged me "I'm not letting you get into this alone"

"Thank you, but one more thing. Chloe can never know" I said. "Agree" Rachel replied.