FGFF ~ Dan and Phil X reader interactive story

6

"Phil, no. I-I just can't, I can't do that. I can't just show up for a tour that he dumped me to go on. I don't even know how I'd feel about all this even then. I'm sorry." I said and watched Phil's face fall.

"I understand. It was awful of me to ask especially this soon. I just wanted to give you what I thought deserved. I'm sorry." He apologized full heartedly.

"I don't deserve anything. I was never entitled in any way to go with you guys, I was never promised that and I was never a part of it."
I watched his blue eyes meet mine before they flickered back down to his lap still looking sad.

"You  were more part of it than you know." He muttered.

"What do you mean?" I questioned his vague statement.

"I really don't think I have the right to talk about it, it's not my place, it's Dan's. I don't think you want to talk about him anymore anyway." I could hear the sound of regret in his voice from what he had said moments ago.

"It seems like it's inevitable to talk about him at this point, I mean here I sit with his best friend. It's strange that It feels just as it did in the mornings at your flat but it's not one of those mornings is it?" I asked and let my brain flash into a memory for a moment.

"Good morning!" Phil greeted me with his daily cheer and cup of coffee he had left for me on the kitchen counter that I was already holding upon entering the lounge where he sat.

"Morning Phil." I plopped down on the sofa beside him on his laptop. I took a sip of my coffee and held it up and thanked him for it tiredly.

"I just made it, you're up a little early." He said.

"Dan elbowed me in the side on accident when he was rolling over. One day those long limbs are going to kill me in my sleep." I said making him chuckle a little.

"Would Dan get a murder charge then? Like what would the outcome of that be?" He joked.

"Sorry for that by the way." Dan had just walked into the room in grey sweatpants looking half asleep. "I don't even know the answer to that and I went to law school, I dropped out, but I was still there." He kissed the top of my  head and sat down in the chair and got on his phone.

"Want to sit with me?" Dan asked.

"Who?" Phil asked making Dan make a stupid noise as his way of saying it was obvious who he was asking. Phil laughed and tried to defend himself as I went over to Dan and sat on his lap with my coffee which he stole a couple sips from. Dan wrapped his arms around me and nuzzled my neck with his nose.

"I like how you look in the mornings." He said very very quietly against my neck so I cave him a quick kiss on the cheek. I just felt so warm and happy.

"Why do you think he did it? Has he even talked about it?" I asked Phil the questions I've been aching to ask but have stopped myself from asking.

"I don't know, he won't talk about it. He just... sort of got quiet. I can't tell if he's sad or angry or what he's feeling. The only time he talked about you was when I asked."

No matter what I wasn't going to cry about it in front of Phil.

"That's okay." I said.

"How do you feel today?" He asked.

"Surprisingly okay." I lied

"I think it's just cause I'm here." He joked.

Phil and I didn't talk anymore about Dan for the next couple of hours he was there, we just talked about our lives before I was with Dan and our YouTube channels.

As soon as he left though I decided to take Owen's advice and keep busy with digitally drawing up some stuff for my next video I had planned, but it was so hard to concentrate on drawing and having a certain idea in mind.

Did my creativity leave me when he did? I just felt so lost about everything, I wanted to lay down and cry instead of trying to do physical tasks.
I couldn't talk about him to Phil, or to Owen because I just wanted everyone to think I was going to be alright.

I didn't have to talk about it though, I could draw it.
And that's what I did quite furiously.

I began to make a whole video based on the painting I painted for Dan acting out our relationship in a series metaphors just like what the painting had depicted.
I wasn't sure wether or not to put this all together and post it or not, or maybe just keep it. Which ever one I chose just doing this felt therapeutic like I was getting it all out somehow.

My hand had begun to hurt after a while but that didn't stop me, I heard Owen come home but that didn't stop me either, my phone went off on my desk and I'd like to say it didn't stop me, but it did, the name it read is actually what stopped me.

The contact name "❤❤" popped up on my phone screen as it wrang. My heart began pounding a million times a minute and I was truly conflicted.
I wanted to talk to him so bad I wanted to hear his voice and what he had to say, on the other hand I was afraid of what he had to say and I knew hearing his voice wouldn't help me get over him even in the slightest.

• Answer the phone for Dan or let it ring?

• Post the cartoon video about your relationship or keep it for yourself?