Negans weakness

Chapter 42

On the ride back to the sanctuary was quite. I didn't ride with Negan and he didn't argue. I think he knew he better not mess with me after all the sh*t that just went down. I was riding in the passenger seat of Dwight's car. I managed to convince Negan not to take Daryl. I really didn't have to put up a fight. He just said 'okay' and went on. There is definitely a reason behind it but I decided not to poke the bear when he was still on his high horse. I'll just wait until we get back to the sanctuary where he can't hurt anymore of my friends.
         "Was it quick?" I ask out of the blue. "Excuse me?" Dwight asked confused. "When you killed that man did you make it quick?" I say looking straight ahead but I could see Dwight look at me. "Why do you care?" I scoff. "Because he was just doing his job."
"Yeah, well he should have known better than to put a gun to the back of your head." I shake my head in disagreement. After a couple seconds of silence Dwight finally answers "Yes. It was quick." Dwight said. I took a deep breath in relief that he didn't suffer. Even if I didn't know him he could have been here because he had no other choice or he was scared to leave. I just hope my group makes the same assumptions about me.
         
          Once we got back to the sanctuary I got out and stormed over to Negan and smacked the sh*t out of him. All the anger that was built up in the car ride came rushing out of me. The smack echoed off of the walls of the sanctuary making it deathly quite were we where. Negan looks at me but he wasn't mad. "I probably deserve that." I scoff  "You deserve a lot more than that you piece of sh*t." I say in utter disgust.
        He shrugs his shoulders unfazed " Yeah, I probably do."  I shake my head in disbelief. "I don't get it. I don't get how you can do that to a person and just go on like nothing ever happened?  You have tortured and killed and manipulated so many innocent people." My voice keeps on getting louder and louder with each word I say. " for f*cks sake you almost made a father cut off his own sons arm off..." I was going to continue but Negan cut me off.
        " I knew it wouldn't have come to that." I furrow my brows in confusion. "How could you have possible of known that?" I say waiting to hear the answer. "Because I know I would have done anything in my power to save my kid. Even if it means having to take orders and provide for a pr*ck like me."
         I roll my eyes " I'm sure you would have." I say sarcastically. There is now way Negan would ever let himself be the victim, be the provider. He loves his reputation too much for that. I turned around and started heading back to my room "and what the h*ll is that supposed to mean?" Negan asks angrily. I keep on walking away from him as I flip him off "Means go f*ck yourself." I yell and still don't turn around.
            Once I got into my room I slammed the door locked it. I just broke down in tears. I had so much anger still inside of me I had to let it out somehow. I went over to my nightstand and screamed as I threw it across the room. I then went to my dresser and knocked it down. I really don't remember much after that. The anger took over me and the next thing I knew my room looked like a tornado was in here. All my clothes, shards of broken glass and furniture was scattered all over the floor. The only think still standing was my bed so I walked over and sat on the edge of it.
          I ran my fingers through my hair as tears were running down my face. All this time I thought they would be hundreds of miles away, hopefully at a military base or something that made them safe. And it comes to find out they where just a few hours away from me this whole time. It really is a small world.