Companions (X men Fanfiction)

Confessions

"What are you doing here Starlight," asked Poultice as he tilted his head and flicked his tail tip from side to side.

I forced a happy rumble. "I came to tell you something Poultice," I confessed as I sat down and I saw Logan grab a chair and sit beside me.

He lowered his hand and stroked me a few times between the ears to try and calm me down. "It'll be alright girl," he assured me in a hushed whisper. I wished I could believe him but I just couldn't.

I took in a rattled breath and looked Poultice right in the eye. "Do you remember how you were asking me earlier where Mirage was," I asked him but I obviously knew he would remember. He had only asked me about an hour ago.

Poultice brightened. "Yeah! Do you know where he is?" He rose to his paws and strode toward me so he could look around. He probably thought that he was behind me, ready to play. However when he wasn't he stared in dismay and sat back. His eyes turned troubled but he knew better than to try and read my mind. Besides I think the Professor was stopping him from reading anyone's mind in the room. "Have you seen him Starlight?"

"Yes I have," I murmured as I looked down on him. So innocent. So young. From the heartbeat he had been born he was destined to have a hard life. I never knew how true that would be until now.

"Then where is he," whined Poultice as his voice began to grow louder and more agitated. "I want to see my brother!"

"You can't," I quickly interrupted and there was a bit of a growl behind my words. I was more angry at myself but it looked like I was angry at him.

"Well why not," asked Poultice before he spiraled around and bounded up to Thruster. "Do you know where he is Thruster? Have you seen him too?"

Thruster let out a murmur before he lowered his head and pushed Poultice back toward me. "She has the answers, I don't." His eyes were grief struck and full of empathy for me. I knew that he wished that he could take the pain away from me but I needed to endure it. It was my fault that Mirage was dead.

"Then where is he Starlight," Poultice asked again as he tried to make his voice deeper and more commanded as to force me to tell him what happened. "I want to see him and I'm sure he wants to see me!"

"I know that he does little one," I began before I stretched out a paw to draw him closer to me. He was a little hesitant but he allowed me to stroke him with long strokes of my pink tongue to try and calm him down. "Know that he wants to see you very much but he can't."

"And why is that," asked Poultice as he closed one eye as I ran over it with my tongue. His pelt tasted of dust, mold, and moisture. He was probably need a bath more than a harsh licking from me but at least it seemed to be relaxing him a bit.

"Because he's dead Poultice," I confessed as I felt my voice crackle and break halfway through.

He suddenly darted out of my grasp and fixed me with round and unblinking eyes. He stood stiff and his fur was plastered against his flank. At first I didn't think he understood me. "What," he rasped.

"He's dead Poultice," I told him a bit sterner and I felt Logan rest a hand on my back to remind me not to be too harsh. However the blow was dealt and I couldn't turn back now. I shoved the hand off my back and I strode toward him. He inched back until he paws collided with the Professor's feet. He looked up at me with pain and sorrow in his eyes and I felt both the Professor's stare and Thruster's stare hard on my pelt.

"You won't see him or smell him or feel his pelt pressed against yours ever again," I finished and I knew how blunt it was since Muffler had told me the same thing when my adopted mother had died.

"H-How do you know," he whispered as he looked up at me with tears beginning to cover his now large eyes.

I lowered my head down until we were eye level. This would be the most painful thing he would probably ever hear from me. "I know because....I killed him."

"No." Poultice looked at me as if he didn't know who I was. His fur bristled until he looked twice his size. Tears began to stream down his face and land on the ground. "No."

I took one more step forward but he tensed before he turned and bolted. "Poultice there was nothing I could do," I called but he wasn't listening. He pushed the Professor's door open with his head before he darted into the hallway. "I swear it was the only way!"

I looked to Thruster who just looked horrified with me. Even the Professor looked a little shocked. Luckily Logan wasn't in shock because he knew and he was with me. He understood the circumstances. However more importantly I knew what had happened and I needed to tell Poultice exactly how it happened or he would never forgive me.

I bunched my muscles but I heard the Professor behind me. "You might want to let him cool down first," he suggested as he wheeled forward a bit and I felt his feet prod my tail a bit.

I flicked my ears and felt my true wolf instincts kick in. "It doesn't sound like it should," I confessed as I turned around and bared my teeth at the Professor. Thruster pushed forward and guarded him, shooting me a warning glance.

"He was under strange mind control," I told the Professor and Logan who just nodded and that encouraged me along. "He didn't know who I was and really I didn't know who he was."

"Did you come at him," asked Thruster as he met my eyes and gulped a bit.

I shook my head and ducked back a bit in horror. "Of course not! He threw me against a pillar and he leaped for my chest. I raised my paws and my claws must have been out and he leaped right on them. I didn't mean to kill him!"

"I believe her," Logan murmured as he stood up and looked to the Professor and Thruster. "I was there and I saw what happened."

I dipped my head thankfully. "Thank you Logan." I then stepped forward and I pressed my pelt against Thruster. "I know it doesn't seem like it but he would never be the same. He would always seem blank and he didn't know what he was doing. He couldn't snap out of it."

"I believe you Starlight," breathed Thruster as he licked me between the ears. "However Poultice does not. All he heard was that you killed his brother."

"I know. I know," I grumbled as I lashed my tail and bit my tongue as I felt pain for Poultice clawing at my heart. "I need to speak with him. Do you think that he's calmed down enough?"

"Probably not but it's not like it's going to get any better," pointed out Logan as he strode toward the Professor. "Just go now Starlight before he does something he'll regret."

I let out a breath and braced my muscles forward. I surged forward and pushed open the door of the Professor's room with my head. I bounded into the hallway and looked around. "Poultice! Poultice where are you?!"

I sighed and lowered my head into my shoulders and lashed my tail. There was one place where I knew that Poultice liked to go when he was stressed but I would need some help getting to him.