I'm Yours {Sequel to Make Me}

Chapter 18

Chapter 18

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The whole family had gone to the beach almost everyday the next week. It was beautiful and sunny, the water was nice and Ciana managed to collect a boatload of shells. They all bonded that week but now, Feliciano and Ludwig were having a rough day.

They'd both woken up on the wrong side of the bed and were grumpy. Ludwig had been trying to read when Feliciano began ranting about some horrible TV show. The German wasn't really paying attention but he would occasionally nod and agree.

"Do you ever even listen to me?" Feliciano snapped at him.

"Of course I listen to you!" Ludwig rolled his eyes, putting the book down onto the table.

"You don't even take me seriously anymore!" Feliciano raised his voice, standing up and glaring down at him.

"You think this is a joke?" Ludwig slowly stood up, towering over the Italian. "Do you think that everything I do for you is a joke? I take a lot of things seriously."

"Like what? The money you bet on me with?" Feliciano spat the words like poison.

Ludwig felt anger flare up in him. He thought they were past that; all their problems and stupid mistakes they'd made. He never thought his fiancé would start an argument over something they promised to put behind them.

"Seems like you took Daniel pretty seriously! All that money just hanging in front of your face!" Feliciano shouted, tears pricking his eyes. "I REALLY AM ONLY WORTH NUMBERS TO YOU!"

"WHEN THE FUCK DID I SAY THAT?" Ludwig roared, clenching his hands into fists. "You are not just dollars to me! God, Feliciano why can you move past something?! You're so damn indecisive all the time! First, we're working on building up our relationship again and now you're fucking going back to our problem!"

The Italian flinched, Ludwig's loud voice ringing in his ears. He could hear Anna and Dave running up the basement stairs to see what all the commotion was about.

"Maybe because it hurts, Ludwig! Maybe because we haven't truly ripped off the damn fucking bandaid yet! Why is the cash still sitting in your bank account?" He screamed, tears streaming down his face. "WHY WON'T YOU JUST GET RID OF IT? GET RID OF ALL THE REMINDERS AND JUST FORGET ABOUT IT!"

"Why can't you forget about the mistake I made and just move the fuck on?! Even though those dollars leave a bitter taste in my mouth, it's still connected to that night!" He shouted.

"Are you saying you can't still enjoy that memory without the cash?" Feliciano crossed his arms.

"Are you just gonna tack on a fucking excuse to everything I say? You can't even let me explain myself! You know, sometimes I've had enough of your damn excuses and your stupid arguments! You make me so so mad and frustrated and I hate it but you just don't stop!" Ludwig was yelling at the top of his lungs now, the words coming out weren't true. They were just what his anger was controlling him to say. "I always have some sort of flaw that you can't stand! Some damn mistake I made that you can't let go of! You just cling to everything bad about me, don't you? Sometimes I just want t-"

"STOP YELLING AT ME, YOU FUCKING DRUG ADDICT!" Feliciano screamed, sobbing once he finished.

The Italian immediately regretted his words as the look of pure heartbreak took over Ludwig's features. He stumbled back a few steps and panted heavily.

Ludwig stared at him, his mind suddenly hazy. He hadn't expected his fiancé to make such painful remark. The German shook his head slightly as he glanced around the room, catching the shocked gazes of Anna, Dave, and Angelina.

Feliciano could feel his heart pounding in his chest, ringing in his ears. He knew he'd deeply hurt Ludwig and didn't want to stay any longer. He couldn't even concoct any sort of sentence. He tensed his jaw, gave Ludwig one last glare and walked out, slamming the door behind him.

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Ludwig went to the bedroom they shared and lay down, hugging a pillow to his chest. He felt numb, hollow. Like someone had just turned him cold-hearted.

Maybe that's all he sees me as; a drug addict. A traitor. An alcoholic.

The German squeezed the pillow tighter, seeking the warmth you could only get from another human.

I knew I would never be enough. I wasn't enough for my mother and my father. I'm sure as hell not enough for him. He's too good for me; innocent, pure. I'm just a monster.

He closed his eyes and buried his face in the pillow, trying to just delete himself from the world.

He hates me. I'm such a fucking idiot. I hurt him and now he's running away. He's probably scared of me. Damn it, I'm always scaring people away.

Ludwig just wanted to disintegrate. He wanted disappear and just get lost. No one needed him. He wanted to fold into a small ball and not exist.

My parents were right. I am an idiot. I'm useless, unwanted. Reckless and hurting people because I just lose control.

Have I lost you, Feliciano?

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Author's Note: I came up with this argument idea. It was not submitted. I don't have any ideas submitted yet. Guys, if I don't get any ideas - either from you wonderful people or myself - I'll have to discontinue this story.

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To be continued... Maybe.

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