Looking - One Direction Fan Fiction

Chapter 11 - Sing Your Heart Out

Charlie's P.O.V.

I told James what mom said, I told him everything. He wouldn't look me in the eyes, he knew if he did I would be able to see how he felt. If he didn't wanting me to know how he felt, he obviously felt pretty hurt. Who could blame him? Our own mother told us this. I still don't understand why she would say that. 

Things were better though, I ignored the pained feeling and pretended everything was okay. I knew that it would make James feel better, and I knew that would be good. Especially because he was always closer to mom.

We were all in the backyard, doing pretty much whatever. I sat on a branch of the big willow tree in our yard, covered by the leaves. I leaned against the trunk and sketched things on my notepad. I had a view of the whole yard through a gap in the leaves, I could see James, Niall, and Louis talking, while Liam, Louis, and Harry played football, well it looked more like they were running around like idiots. 

I drew random things, I'm not sure what some of them even were, just random designs I guess. I silently hummed to myself enjoying the sunshine. "CHARLIEE!" James shouted, "We're havin' lunch! It's a picnic!" I climbed down the tree, leaving the notebook in a box with all my art supplies, so the boys wouldn't take it from me. I came out of the giant wall of leaves and headed over to the blanket on the ground. 

"Glad you could join us!" Louis chirped, before taking a large bite of his sandwich. I chuckled and shook my head, turning to James asking which sandwich was mine. Of course,  It was the peanut butter one. 

The radio played in the background, playing Olly Murs, "Thinking Of Me". I couldn't help but smile, I'd always loved this song. I nodded my head with the music while taking a bite of my sandwich. I looked up to see James staring at me. His eyes were practically begging me to sing. I just didn't think I could. 

After we ate, the boys all went and played football, actually trying this time. I sat on the ground watching them and listening to the radio. 

I couldn't take it any more, all the music, all the things I wanted to say, All the emotions I was holding in. I needed to sing. 

I jumped up, yelling over my shoulder that I was going inside for a bit. I ran down the hallway until I came across the door. Quickly unlocking it, I closed it not bother to lock it, all the boys were outside. I sat down at the piano, my fingers brushing against the keys. How I missed that feeling. 

Slowly, my fingers danced until they found where they wanted to be, and then they played. I closed my eyes, it felt so good, I could finally get all my emotions out. And then, I sang.

This is my confessional

Pen and paper

Saying things that you thought, 

were never on my mind

Let the truth pour out

'Cause I'm tired of the games

I won't lie, no I'm not okay

You were wrong, you're to blame

Now the world knows your name

So here you go, 

You finally get a song about you on the radio

Are you happy now that you broke me down

Now I curse the day that I met you

I hope you know this song is about you

This is no mistake, yes I meant to

I hope you know this song is about you, about you

This song is about you, yeah

Seems I'm feeling better now, 

I like the way our heads lifted off my chest

Should have done that months ago

If I knew back then it would feel like this

'Cause you done all the games

I won't lie, no I'm not okay

You were wrong, you're to blame

Now the world knows your name

So here you go

You're finally getting a song about you on the radio

Are you happy now that you broke me down, 

Now, I curse the day that I met you

I hope you know this song is about you

This was no mistake, yes, I meant to

I hope you know this song is about you

When you hear this play

I hope you feel the same way that I felt that day

That you left me, yeah, you left me

This is my confessional 

Pen and paper

I'm gonna write this down

So here you go, 

You finally get a song about you on the radio

Are you happy now that you broke me down

Now I curse the day that I met you

I hope you know this song is about you

This is no mistake, yes I meant to

I hope you know this song is about you, about you

This song is about you

This song is about you, yeah

This song is about you

This song is about you, oh....

I sang the last word, and hit the last key. It felt so good, I smiled to myself, proud that I didn't give up completely. 

And then they clapped. I spun around to see all 6 boys standing at the doorway, smiling. How long had they been there? "You were really good! Fantastic!" Zayn spoke, breaking the silence. I managed to nod my head, still processing that they had watched me. 

James ran over to me and pulled me into a big hug. "I'm so glad you decided to play again" He whispered into my ear. 

"But she never stopped." We all turned around to see Niall standing in the door way, looking shocked at what we said and nervously looking in my direction. How did he know that?

"What?" James questioned, they all looked so confused. Niall glanced at me, and a gave him a small nod, signaling it was okay if he told them.

"She uhm... she still played." He finally managed to say.

"And how did you know that...?" Liam asked suspiciously. 

"Well, one of our first nights here. When she woke up screaming, I saw her go downstairs after, so I followed. And she came into this room and I was curious about what she was going to do, so I watched. Then she started to play the piano, and she sang. So she did still play, just not in front of people. Or, at least without them knowing." He really had it all figured out... I looked around and all the boys were nodding their head, approving of what I did. 

James grabbed me by the arms and pulled me off the chair, "lets go back outside!" he said, knowing that I didn't want this to be a big deal.

I looked back at the piano one more time before leaving the room, and thought about the song I had just sang.

That song was about you, mom. 

Authors Note: I was going to write this tomorrow, but because I've been getting a lot of good feedback lately, I decided to write it today. Hope you liked it! Vote, Comment, Fan, whatever! Thanks so much! 

Hannah xx