23-06-14

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Dear Elliot,

i talked to tanya about niall and she encouraged me to get out there.

what she meant by out there was a bit vague don't you think?

everyone these days are vague, aren't they?

that's why i like you, you're easy with me.

mum has began to ignore me in hopes of me 'stopping my search for attention by seeing what I'm missing' and honestly ell, (I hope you don't mind if I call you this sometimes) it's just bringing me the solitude ive desired.

the thing about the world is, you never get what you want. even if its somehow going there, there is always a twist.

my unfortunate twist is instead of being asked how things are from niall, i get it from mum.

i mean, no offence, i will love her to death no matter what terrible job she's doing, but i'd prefer being questioned by niall.

did i do something wrong?

ive never had an infatuation, or hell even acquaintancy ( if thats even a word) with anyone , and i happen to not know how this whole thing works.

maybe he forgot about me.

maybe i just didn't occupy his mind the way he did mine.

and, if i'm being brutally informative, it hurts a hell of a lot.

-Cass

 

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