Love Thy Neighbor

Chapter 11

It's the middle of November and it is freezing. I've just gotten home from work and am peeling off layers after my walk in the snow. My phone pings.

Shawn: Our reservation is for 7:00. Will you be ready in 15?

Me: Yepper

Yepper? I am such a dork sometimes.

I quickly get ready, changing into something a bit dressier. I choose a pair of skinny black jeans, tall black boots, and a turquoise v-neck sweater. I wear my hair down in loose waves.

There's a knock a the door right as I finish.

Shawn stands in my doorway looking amazing. He's wearing navy blue slacks and a gray button down under his coat.

"Jess...you look gorgeous," he says at me as he looks me up and down.

Normally I would think being looked over like this was kind of rude, but I blush and whisper a thank you.

He leans in and gives me a soft kiss on my cheek.

I grab my purse, lock up, and we make our way down the hall.

"Where are we going?" I ask.

"There's a fantastic sushi place on the other side of town. Do you like sushi?"

I nod. "I love sushi."

It does not take long to drive to the sushi place. Walking from the parking lot to the restaurant, he takes my hand in his, interlacing our fingers. It feels so perfect, like our hands were meant to fit together.

We're seated in a corner booth way at the back, instead of at the more public sushi bar up front.

"You order for us," I insist. "Just please no shellfish for me."

He orders sake and an assortment of sushi. The chef sends out a complimentary seaweed salad first, presumably because Shawn's a celebrity.

As we're waiting for the sushi to arrive, Shawn gets a call and apologetically steps away. I decide to check Instagram, since I haven't for a couple days.

My sister has posted a dozen silly pics with her friends. My friends have mostly posted pics of either what they are drinking or eating. I move over to my explore feed.

There I see several pics of Shawn with the model. I initially assume they are old, but I click on one. It was posted three days ago by one of his fan accounts. It's a side by side collage of him going into her apartment at night and exiting the next morning. The caption says they were reportedly seen cuddling in a restaurant earlier that evening.

I really don't know what to think.

We're on a date, but we're not really 'dating.' We've never kissed. Honestly, we've never even discussed the potential for anything happening.

But he is with me right now on what he called a second date, and it hurts to think just days before he was with someone else. It's not cheating. It just stings.

Shawn returns to the table after five minutes or so.

"Sorry...Andrew, my manager, had a question about cover art for the album. Still no sushi?"

"No. I'm sure it will be here soon."

And as if by magic, the waitress sets down a large platter with an elegant assortment of sushi.

"Can I ask you something?" I say.

"You just did. But yes, of course," he jokes, while using his chopsticks to take a piece of the spicy tuna roll.

"Do you have a girlfriend?"

"Do I have a girlfriend?" He sets the piece of sushi down instead of eating it.

"That was the question."

"What prompted this?" he asks.

I decide to be honest. "I just saw something on Instagram."

A look flashes across his handsome face. Disappointment?

"I don't. But if you are asking me if I am seeing anyone, then that's a different question."

"Okay. Are you?"

He leans back in his chair and narrows his eyes slightly. His expression serious.

"There are a couple people I see from time to time."

"And you saw one of them a couple days ago." I say it as a statement and not a question.

"I did, but you should know that I told her I probably would not be seeing her again."

"Why's that?" I ask.

"Because I feel kind of weird about it, given that I am trying to start something with you."

Wow. I was not expecting that, but it still bothers me that he was with her a few days ago.

"But you stayed over at her place. You slept with her?" I know I am probably pushing this too far, but I can't stop myself.

"Yes."

I take a piece of sushi. I eat it, but I can't enjoy it because of how awkward the conversation has become. It tastes like nothing. I have no appetite.

We eat about a third of the platter in silence before Shawn suggests we leave. He's not stupid; he knows this date is a disaster. The silent meal is followed by a silent ride home.

At my door he runs his hand through his dark curls.

"Jess, we should talk about this. I can see that you are upset. Come in to my place, let's have a drink and discuss it." He pauses. "I like you. You know that, right?"

I shake my head. "I like you, too, Shawn, but I don't think we should be more than friends. I just don't have what it takes to date you. I am a 'one guy and one girl' kind of person. I would never ask you to commit to me, because I suspect you aren't the committing type. I can't start something if there are other people in the picture."

He starts to say something and stops. I figure he knows what I said is true.

I turn, unlock my door, and go inside. After I get ready for bed and am lying alone in the dark, I tell myself this is all for the best.