Love Thy Neighbor

Chapter 61

It's almost a relief when Shawn leaves on tour. I mean, it totally sucks for me and Lila to have him gone, because his absence leaves a gigantic hole in our lives. But, touring gives him the distraction he needs right now. I even think a break from trying to conceive is good for him. The pressure has not been good for either of us.

The tour starts in South America. From there he travels to Mexico. He's then home for a week. Their next stops are New Zealand, Australia, and Asia. This part of the tour is actually eleven days since there is a lot of travel time. After that he goes to Europe. He will do three separate one week tours there. The winter holidays fall after the first week in Europe. He will be home for two weeks so that he is around for both Hanukkah and Christmas and Lila's 3rd birthday. The North American leg is by far the easiest as far as the schedule. It is broken up into four mini-legs. He does the west coast, the central part of the country, the east coast, and then Canada. In between each mini-leg, he will be home for a week. The tour runs from November to March. He's only doing 40 shows, which is fewer than he's done in the past, but he says he wants it to be about quality instead of quantity.

We have to celebrate American Thanksgiving without Shawn. We'd celebrated the Canadian equivalent together the month prior. Both of our families came to celebrate with us then, which was fun. I love how close my folks have gotten with Shawn's.

We've pretty much kept our baby making struggles to ourselves. Our families knew we were trying and knew I was not pregnant. Initially there were questions, but I think everyone figured out that it was a very sensitive subject for us and quit bringing it up.

I vent to Kendra frequently. I didn't say anything to Liz or Jules, though. We'd gotten together over the summer and I didn't want to spend our girls weekend talking about my problems. Liz and Jules were both married but neither of them was eager to start a family. They both had said at various times that they wanted to wait until they were 30. Kendra is a great listener and is a firm believer in the idea that things always work out.

Shawn gets back from the South American and Mexican leg early November, and the Oceania and Asian leg of the tour right after Thanksgiving. He's beautifully tanned and seems revitalized. The frequent return trips home seem to be keeping the homesickness at bay. I think we were both worried that he'd have issues like he'd had when we were first together.

It is glorious when he comes home. The saying "absence makes the heart grow fonder" may be a tired cliche, but there is a lot of truth to it. We basically sequester ourselves in the house and spend every moment together that we can. On both of his breaks at home, I've had to work, but Shawn insists that Marian take the week off so that he can watch Lila and spend the time with her. He heads off to Europe in early December. His next visit home is longer, and I'm looking forward to that.

Shawn's extended time home for the holidays finally arrives. He gets home on Friday and the next day is Lila's birthday. Her birthday falls on a weekend she is with her dad, so they are throwing her a family party at their new home in Queens. David's dad is there, since his mom passed away soon after Ethan was born. Perri's parents are there, too. My family will see Lila soon, so they did not make the trip.

The party is fun and Lila loves being the center of attention. I hate that she isn't with us for her birthday weekend, but I have to accept that this is how shared custody works. I snuggle baby Ethan for most of the party since Perri is busy entertaining. Shawn usually adores babies, but he seems to be avoiding holding Ethan. Of course I understand why.

Lila is staying with David for several days after her birthday so that she can celebrate part of Hanukkah with him and his family before coming to our house to celebrate. We are flying to Montreal for the last couple days of Hanukkah and will then go straight to Toronto/Pickering for Christmas.

The holidays, especially when you celebrate several of them, are very hard to coordinate. Unlike Shawn's previous two tour breaks at home, he's not doing much relaxing. I feel guilty about it all, even if it's not my fault.

It feels like Shawn just got home, when I'm putting him back in a plane so he can resume the European tour.

"I'm going to miss you, Jessica," he says as he holds me close. He gives me a long kiss.

"What about me?" a small voice chimes in.

He picks Lila up and gives her a kiss on each cheek. "I'll miss you most of all. Remind mommy to send me a picture of you every single day!"

Lila turns to me. "Send Shawn a picture every day."

"Thanks sweetie. Got it," I say laughing.

He gives me one last kiss and heads through security.

"I hate the tour," Lila says as we walk out of JFK airport.

"Before you know it, Shawn will be back. And remember, we're going to California to surprise him when he starts touring in North America. What's in California?"

"Disneyland!" she screams.

I'd coordinated with Andrew, Shawn's manager, to arrive in Los Angeles for Shawn's show there. Lila and I will surprise Shawn backstage. The next day I will take her to Disneyland. I'd love for Shawn to come, but I know crowds like that are tough when you are famous. Lila and I are then going to follow him for the next three stops on the west coast tour. He'll fly back to New York with us for his next break.

Author's note:

Thanks for getting this story to 1000+ reads!

This chapter was kind of filler before the finale, since the story will be completed this week. I'm both happy and sad about that.