Lamahista
Kabanata Labing-Anim
May isa sa maraming pagkakataon sa buhay ng isang babae na kung saan ay nakakaramdam tayo ng magkahalong kaba, takot, at ligaya. Kaba at takot lalo ng kung single ka. Single. Unattached. No boyfriend. No husband. Na-dah.
And on the other hand, ligaya. Not happiness out of such thrilling or fun adventure. But happiness out of uncertainty and hope. Right. I’m not really making any sense, am I? Forget it. You don’t have to care about how I feel, anyway.
*One Message Received*
Aries Tuazon
Meet me. Lopez Corner Café. Now. Preshiela, please.
I did not expect Aries to text me tons of messages the entire week, but that’s exactly what he did. Hindi pa kami nagkakausap simula nung gabing hinalikan niya ko at nagtapat siya sakin. Funny. Sinasabi ko ito sa paraang tila ba si Aries ang baliw na baliw sa akin, samantalang ako ang unang nawalan ng puso dahil ninakaw niya ito noong elementary pa lamang kami. This could have been easy. Kayang-kaya kong pumunta sa Café sa mga segundong ito. Kumaripas ng lakad at makipag-make out sa first love ko sa gitna ng mga tao. I won’t mind. Really. But that is if I’m not with Eros.
We’re walking hand in hand, him whistling, me swooning. Did I mention this is the first time I’m going out with a guy? As in really going out for a date? Well, it is. At least for me, this is a date. I don’t know about him.
“You do realize you’ve been squeezing my hand so tight since we left your house, right?” He smiled down at me. But that’s exactly the problem. I’ve been spacing out since yesterday. Masyado akong maraming iniisip na hindi ko namalayang pahigpit na ng pahigpit ang kapit ko sa kamay niya. Maybe I just don’t wanna lose him. Especially now.
“I’m sorry.” I smiled and tiptoed to kiss his cheeks. Hindi niya siguro iyon inasahan dahil pansumandali siyang natigilan. Nasa mall kami at papunta sa sinehan. Yes kids, what I did is an act of public display of affection. Pero yun talaga ang dapat gawin lalo na kung ubod ng gwapo ang kasama niyo, you brand them. In front of those itchy bitches.
“It’s my pick.” He reminded me as we pay for the tickets. Napagkasunduan naming hindi namin pag-uusapan kailanman ang mga narinig niya mula sa likod ng kurtina. Yes, he did mention it after my parents left. Especially the boyfriend part. I swear I was beyond mortified. Kaya siya ang pumipili ng papanooring namin ngayon. Of course, it’s a boy movie. What did you expect? “Let’s go.” Hinawakan niya ang kamay ko at pumasok na kami sa sinehan. Though I’m not very sure I’ll be able to behave being with this man, in a dark and cold room. Let’s not mention that he’s a very wanton man, too.
And thank good god he didn’t mention the ‘I love you’ thingy as well. Siguro hindi niya rin alam kung ano ang isasagot niya duon. But it’s fine, I’m not sure if I meant it anyway.
