Forgotten Hallucinations

-14: Close-

J's POV

I don't know how long she sat there and how long I watched. The cold rain beating down on her, she didn't do anything for a while, then she tilted her head down a bit. It hung there.

I didn't know why she was there. Who sits in the grass while it's raining? People get sick that way.

But for some reason I couldn't bring myself to go bring her inside. It was if I was under a trance, watching this slim, pale figure ever so still, quietly. I could only imagine what she was thinking about. Her pain, her thoughts, her past, her emotions.

In this life, everything is odd and unique to each individual. At some point, there will be some sort of joy and at some point there must be pain. We just don't know how long each will last.

All of that stopped when she suddenly rose and ran into the house, swinging the glass back door open and almost colliding with me. I'm still not sure how I missed her. She ran upstairs before I could say or do anything, leaving a trail of puddles on the floor. I walked towards to the edge of the stairs and looked towards the top. What had happened? What is it that she ran like that inside, with such a worried face and a purpose?

Quietly, I climbed up the stairs and approached her room. I heard things being moved and shuffled. She was rummaging through things in every corner until she enter the closet and came out with a box. She sat in the center of the room with it, opening it to see another box, and many pictures. She looked torn between happiness and pain, which only grew more when she opened the much small one to see a ring, necklace, and note. She unfolded the paper and read it to herself. On the floor she laid afterwards. Somewhat curled to the side.

For the first, I saw her cry, almost to her heart's content.

I closed the door to her room without a sound and went to the loft to sit on the couch. I could still hear her. I had never felt so pained before. I'm not sure why I did now.

She didn't leave her room.

~~~~~~•~~~~~~

"Scar...?" I called softly, while opening the door. It was early the next morning, before the sunrise. I thought I should check on her, before everyone (Simi) is awake.

Scar was still laying in her side, facing the other way on the floor with the small box. But her body looked more pale than usual and empty.

Without thinking, I scurried next her to check. She was indeed still alive. I took her legs onto my arm and used my other as a support for her back, as I carried her to her bed.

Cold. Very cold. One side of her clothes were wet. I didn't notice she was wearing the same thing since. No wonder...

Laying her down, I head to her closet and pick out a sweater and sweatpants. She can't keep wearing those clothes, and I'll need to get her medicine or something warm...

As I approach the bed, I remember something.

"Oh no.... How am I even..." Well, I'll endure and be respectful. With caution, I replaced what she was wearing with something new, and quickly exited.

I felt somehow, as I leaned against the closed door to her room. Embarrassed? Flustered? Curious? I don't know, but every time the thought of her smooth skin comes to mind, I can't help but feel this way.

"Ah, what's wrong with you?" I walk back downstairs to get medicine, water and heat pack. I hope this helps her feel better.

I opened the door and put the items on a nearby table stand, only to see her sitting crisscrossed on the bed. Empty were her eyes. Tired and hopeless were her face and shoulders.

She looks up to me. "Did you change my clothes?"

"Ah yeah, you were drenched and I'd didn't want to let you get ill..." I scratched my head and braced myself from what may happen. She could scream at me, slap me, beat me, stab me in my sleep, kill me right here or even torture me.

Torture doesn't seem like a bad idea if you think about it. If you get what I'm saying. *winks*

Oh no....

She puts down each foot gently on the floor and stands up. Slowly approaching, I close my eyes, to scared to witness what may happen.

She stops next to myself shoulder. "Thank you..." she whispers before exiting. I stood here for a moment, then quickly stepped into the hallway and saw her enter the bathroom.

I let out a loud sigh of relief. "She didn't kill me." But she didn't take her medication. She'll take it later I guess.

....

It felt like an hour passed and I came back upstairs to check on Scar. I wondered if she took what I left and was drinking a lot of water.

Seems like you've taken an interest in her...

"Really? Just keep quiet."

Hey, I'm just stating the facts.

Facts? What facts? I laughed to myself.

When I entered, she wasn't in her room, nor was she in her bathroom. She wasn't downstairs when you were and she wasn't in the loft. I looked to see the door to bathroom in the hallways was still closed.

It's still closed.

I ran to check the time. It has been almost 20 minutes. 20 minutes was a while.

She couldn't have...
She wouldn't have....
Would she..?

"Scar! Open the door!" I desperately twist the handle and bang he door to no avail. She can't do this, not now at least. Why? This keeps going on and off, happy, sad. Why is she like this?

After several attempts, I forcefully push the door open. Everything stopped. The sounds to be heard was my breathing, the bath faucet running, and water mixed with a deep red spilling over. An arm rested on the waters surface. A large cut from the wrist almost the halfway to the elbow was the source. A blade sat on the edge. A body sat in the bath with a head hanging to the side. The face.

"Scar...." Why didn't I see this coming? Wasn't there something I could have done?

I walked to the edge and checked her neck. I felt it. There was still something. I touched her face.

"Can I really?" I asked.

A/N:
Sorry if this was short or too depressing...