The Accident: Based On A True Story

Chapter Seventeen

Friday has arrived and tonight I'm going out with Liam again. Honestly, its the perfect timing. I ran out of pills again and I can't go ask Lorraine for more of hers after taking them last time.

Sitting in class today was the hardest with nothing to numb at least a little of what I'm feeling.

"Okay, solve for X and Y.", I read silently in my head off a work sheet my math teacher gave us all. " Someone I know has to have something. This is high school after all. "X multiplied by-", ugh I can't think straight. Not that I'm proud of it, but I copied off of Shaylene who sits next to me and gets straight A's. Noticing my struggle, she slid her paper over so I could see. Probably out of pity but whatever at this point.

Leah and Sam tried, as they have been, to interact with me. Not for it, I quickly ended every conversation before excusing myself to anywhere else.

"You know, it's hard for us too. You aren't the only one hurting.", Leah says as I'm walking away from the school at the end of the day. "And now we lost you too."

"What do you want me to say Leah?", annoyed, I asked.

"You don't have to say anything. But stop pushing us away. We haven't talked to you in weeks.", Sam chimed in.

Not in the mood and dropping my hand to the side, "Sorry. Is that what you want to hear?"

Neither of them answer immediately.

"I need to go.", I tell them as I turn my back and walk away.

Who do they think they are? Fine, you lost a friend, but I lost my family at my own hands. Big difference. I can't, and refuse to, deal with others emotions right now. I'm not the one.

.....

Waiting for Liam to get to my house, I get ready. Carmen said she'd do my makeup again when I get there so I'm just going to do my mascara and cover up. Before leaving, I searched our medicine cabinets for anything but found nothing. Maybe that's what's best.

Charlie, our German Shepherd hasn't been fed today. I feel bad because I haven't spent much time with him. That was Ryan's thing.

"Hey Charlie.", I say to him after going in the backyard. He seems happy to see me and I him. Filling up his dog bowl, I sit down next to it on the step. Instead of eating he comes and puts his head on my lap. Its like he knows what's up or is sad himself.

"You okay buddy?", I ask knowing he could never actually tell me. "I know. Its hard, right? I'm sorry I'm not as awesome with you as Ryan but I'll try to be." I spend the rest of my time waiting for Liam, with Charlie.

Hearing the loud roar of his motorcycle, I meet Liam outside and hop on his motorcycle after putting the helmet on. This next party is by the lake. The same one I would go to every summer. Not sure I'm ready for this. But here goes nothing.

We pulled up to the lake. Cars lined the dirt road leading up to it.

"Where's my girl?", Carmen says as Liam and I get off the bike.

"Hey.", I said before Carmen hugged me.

A campfire is going while everyone parties, drinks, eats, etc.

Liam is already on something when Carmen finishes my makeup. Not sure what it is but he seems very... Happy.

"Dance with me.", Liam said.

"You guys just got here. Give her some time to build up to that.", Carmen said before doing a line. She holds up the rolled up dollar bill and puts it in from me as if to ask if I want some. I took it.

"I've never done this before. I won't die, right?", I told her.

"No, you won't die.", Jake said thinking it was funny.

"Just put one end of the bill up to your nose and breathe in."

I tried to do what Carmen said but blew some away instead.

"Sorry.", I said as they chuckled.

"It happened to all of us the first time.", Liam noted. " Make sure to close the other side of your nose."

I tried again and it worked. My eyes watered, I felt a burning sensation go from nostril down to my throat. It wasn't painful but more so a weird feeling. Within seconds, I got a numbing sensation. This was so much better than the pain meds I had been taking. Suddenly I had energy but it didn't last very long. I found myself doing it a few more times that night.

As the night went on, everyone started jumping in the lake and throwing others in.

"You down to swim?", Liam asked all of it.

"Already on it.", Carmen said as she took off her dress. Soon, like many of the swimmers, only wearing their underclothes.

"You?", he asked me as he took off his shirt and jumped in.

I walked closer to the lake and thought, " What the hell.", jumping in fully clothed. Liam splashed water at me so I returned the action. It was the first time in what felt like forever, that I really laughed. He came closer to me in the water, pulled me in and did something I didn't expect - he kissed me. The moment was just that, a moment. As we all heard sirens come, we ran out and tried to get out of there as quickly as possible. Exhilarating would be the word for it.

Running to get to respected rides, Carmen whispered something to me.

"Just be careful with Liam. He has a lot of issues."

What did she mean by that? I didn't have time to ask. Loam and I, still soaking wet, jumped on his motorcycle and drove off.