batfamily groupchat

seven

[ a bunch of dysfunctional orphans™ ]

damiwayne: petition to kill tim drake?

babsgordon: what has he done now?

toddster: do we even need to know? i'll sign it

dickiebird: okay, but did anyone hear bruce's exasperated sigh after damian sent that message? i hear this 'ping' sound from his office and then a 'HHHHHHHHHHHH'

stephbrown: what has the coffee-fucker done now?

damiwayne: he just fuckign knocked every plate out of the cabinet and didn't even clean it up?? he just looked around with wide eyes and then scurried away to his precious coffee machine??

toddster: don't swear, you are a CHILD

timbo: sounds fake but okay

damiwayne: I LITERALLY WATCHED YOU CLIMB ON TOP OF THE CABINET TO TRY TO GET YOUR "BUSH DID 9/11" MUG AND IT ALL CAME CRASHING DOWN

timbo: you can't prove that

damiwayne: yes?? i can?? the dishes are smashed on the ground and i have a video??

timbo: uhhhhh

timbo: i was trying to get my "TED CRUZ IS THE ZODIAC" mug, i'll have you know

toddster: wait

toddster: can you send the video??

damiwayne: will it convince you all to sign the petition?

casscain: maybe

stephbrown: of course!

timbo: wow,, betrayed by my own ex,,

stephbrown: *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧ shut the fuck up *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

damiwayne sent a video to the chat

damiwayne: i like to call this video 'caffeinated-disaster-on-legs.mp4'

dickiebird: crikey

toddster: holy shit

toddster: that crashed and burned faster than any relationship i've ever been in

toddster: i'm impressed

casscain: that was some... colourful language, tim..

stephbrown: tag yourself, i'm "FUCKITY FUCKSAUCE, STICK UP MY ASS"

dickiebird: i'm "damian, this isn't what it looks like. it's a conspiracy!"

babsgordon: i'm "OH fUCK, NOT THE PEPE PLATE"

toddster: i'm "at least this one isn't broken,,, FUCK"

casscain: i'm "my cat like agility didn't save me this time"

dickiebird: ooh

dickiebird: i'm also "aH, MY BUTT"

damiwayne: i'm "@ god, why do you do this to me?"

toddster: god left a long time ago, buckaroo

timbo: i'm all of the above

brucewayne: No, Tim. You're grounded, actually.

timbo: ahahdhf

timbo: @ god,

timbo: why

babsgordon: i sometimes wish that i lived in wayne manor, just so i can experience the shit shows like this one.

alfredpennyworth: Trust me when I say that one wants to live in this Hell of a manor.

brucewayne: Alfred!

alfredpennyworth: .. I was hacked, Master Bruce.

brucewayne: You sure about that?

alfredpennyworth: It's the only possible explanation. I'll start cleaning up those dishes, now.

brucewayne: Good idea.

damiwayne: anyway,,

damiwayne: who else is gonna sign that petition?

toddster: i signed it before you even explained.