Almost, But Not Quite (COMPLETED)

Chapter 24

#ABNQ24 Chapter 24

Tahimik lang ako talaga ako pagkatapos sabihin ni Psalm iyong 'Ikaw pa lang nakaka-sakay na babae' na kaartehan niya. As in hindi pa ako nakakapagsalita simula nun! I mean, what was I supposed to say?! Na masyado niya akong spoiled na bumalik pa kami sa bahay nila para lang 'di na ako mairita sa Cartier na iniwan ni White Lady?!

My mind was starting to wander to places I didn't even want to go to.

"We're here," he said, pulling over.

Tahimik pa rin akong naka-upo, clutching on the hem of my dress. What a bad day to wear a dress. Gusto ko na talaga magmarathon palayo sa kanya.

"Joey," he said when I still wasn't moving.

Instead, I took a deep breath, closed my eyes, and hoped that everything's gonna be fine.

"A-ah," I said, my lips still quivering a little. Grabe naman kasi! Bakit ba ganito iyong effect sa akin nung sinabi ni Psalm? Maybe Jax was right; spoiled nga talaga kaming mga tatlo nila Kitty ng mga guy friends namin.

"Are you okay?" he asked, looking worried.

I nodded, then fucking smiled. Great. Ako 'tong naiinis sa kanya kapag nagsa-smile siya kahit obvious naman na hindi totoo, tapos ako 'tong gumagawa sa kanya ngayon. What a hypocrite, Joey.

I knew Psalm didn't buy my lie, but he didn't point it out. Lumabas na kami, and pumasok sa loob. Tahimik lang si Psalm habang nag-iinquire ako sa schedule and whatnots ng review center.

"San ka galing?" I asked because he wasn't there after I was done transacting. Nagpa-reserve na ako ng slot since mabilis maubos dito since ito 'yung pinaka-sikat sa Metro na review center. Though 'di ko pa talaga nasasabi sa family ko 'tong balak ko dahil ayoko talaga ma-pressure.

"Wandered around," he said. "You done?"

I nodded. "Naka-bayad na ko ng reservation," I said. Pagkatapos kong magsalita, napansin ko na naka-tingin pa rin siya sa 'kin. "What?"

"You're still worried," he pointed-out.

"Am not."

"You are," he insisted. "You're obvious," he continued.

I didn't comment on that. Sabi kasi ni Jax, minsan, sobrang hirap ko raw maintindihan kasi madalas walang reaction iyong mukha ko. Mukhang neutral lang ako sa lahat ng bagay kaya 'di niya masabi agad kung ano ang nasa isip ko. But with Psalm, parang gets niya na agad kahit wala pa akong sinasabi. I wasn't sure if I was being more transparent, or if he was just paying attention.

Either way, uncharted territory.

"Of course I'm nervous," I admitted. "It's a huge step for me," sabi ko habang naglalakad kami palabas. Psalm was just quietly listening, as if he was allowing me to rant. "I know I said na 'di ko sinabi sa parents ko kasi ayokong ma-pressure, but truth was, ayoko lang sila ma-disappoint in case na bumagsak ako. Alam mo 'yun? 'Di naman ako takot bumagsak kasi nangyayari naman talaga. Mas takot ako sa iisipin ng parents ko, ng ibang tao. I just hate disappointing the people around me," I said, and finished it with a heavy sigh.

Hanggang makarating kami pabalik sa sasakyan ni Psalm, nagrarant pa rin ako. Tahimik lang si Psalm, but he made me feel na he's listening. I admire that about him.

We were just inside the car while I was talking. Naka-bukas lang iyong engine, but Psalm didn't look like he's about to drive. Hinahayaan niya lang akong magsalita.

"Sorry, ang dami ko na yatang nasabi," I apologized when I realized na almost 20 minutes na pala kaming nandito lang sa sasakyan.

He looked at me, then smiled a little. "It's alright."