Love Sucks

Love Sucks - 23

Soooooo..

I'm not impressed with this chapter, but hey, it's all I can scrape up xD

I uploaded two chapters because I split it into two ;;

Enjoy

Chapter twenty three;

My muscles ached and my bones were stiff from sitting in the same position on my windowsill for four and a half hours; back on the wall, knees brought up to chest with my arms wrapped tightly around them, my head leaning against the window. Despite it being sunny outside, I had never felt more miserably confused in my entire life. And that was really saying something, considering the company I kept. But it was that precise company whom was making me feel this way. Or at least, his actions were. Maybe I had made the biggest mistake of my life by almost-kissing Alex. Maybe it wasn't a mistake. Maybe it was for the best that I had a little taste of bliss.

And I can assure you, bliss had never tasted sweeter.

But it never lasted longer than a minute for me; in sixty seconds, our lips had brushed, my skin had tingled, his touch sending shivers down to my core. In sixty seconds, everything came together for that tiny millisecond that our lips had touched, even if it was just our bottom lips. They still touched.

And then, in less than a second everything had crumbled apart again. My skin tingled with the cold breeze because he wasn't stood with me, and the shivers I wanted to feel were gone. He was gone. For one whole minute, everything was okay; time had stopped for us to endure our moment. How could something so right be so wrong? How could something so close be so far out of our reach?

He was gone now; probably sucking the life out of somebody far away. As selfish as that sounded, I could muster up nothing more than a weak little prayer for those who might die tonight. A prayer that would never be heard, a prayer that was useless. But I made it all the same for those innocent people who would be killed, because I cared. Maybe not enough, though, and that was what terrified me senseless.

"Why? Scared you're going dark?" My voice muttered smugly.

"How can I not be scared?" I whispered out loud. It was true - it was impossible not to be scared of the outcome, because no matter what happened, somebody was going to die. Whether that was me if I go light, or someone else when I needed to feed if I go dark.

I just couldn't win.

I stared down at the front driveway. My mother was out there, crouched down in front of the garden patch in the grass planting seeds and picking weeds. She'd washed her car; a grey bucket was sat on the other side of the car, the vehicle soapy and glistening wet in the bright sunlight. I wish I could tell her everything that was running through my mind, tell her everything that was going on in my life. I needed a mother's opinion with what I was going through, I just didn't have a mother who'd understand that there was more than humans out there. She got freaked out by reading sci-fi and thriller books and watching ghost documentaries on the TV - imagine if I proved to her vampires and all sorts existed.

Makes you really wonder what else is out there, doesn't it? Hiding right under your nose, living throughout your day-to-day life while you're oblivious to the dark, shadowy secrets kept behind closed doors.

The sunlight was beginning to make my eyes burn, so I jumped down off of the windowsill, pulling the curtains across which darkened my entire room. I sighed heavily, everything clicking as I moved my tired body towards my bed. I moved all of the covers to the bottom of the bed since it was too hot, and climbed onto the bed, closing my eyes and wishing for a peaceful slumber that could only temporarily make all my troubles go away.