A Fine Messa

Cold Hands, Warm Heart (Ep. 24)

Episode Twenty-Four -- Cold Hands, Warm Heart

It was all a bluff. At least that is what Mariah told herself while walking as briskly as possible. Noah merely intended to scare the crap out of her, make her believe that he had every intention of abandoning her on an empty, dark road. Shortly she would spot his headlights, he would spot her on the side of the road and let her in. Sure the ride home would be filled with tension, but at least Mariah would be safe and warm.

That's what she told herself while walking, hands plunged into the side pockets of her jeans, head lowered in an effort to keep the chilly air from blowing directly upon her face. Mariah kept believing Noah would return for the first fifteen minutes. That belief morphed into hope for the next fifteen or so minutes then she capitulates, face turned toward a mostly clear sky with twinkling stars. She could swear those stars mockingly winked at her for behaving like such a colossal idiot. Inwardly cursing her brother's name she keeps moving picking up the pace as best she can with aching joints.

Mariah knows something is wrong, that she is trapped in a horrible situation when her body first starts encouraging then insisting that she give up and select a tree to collapse against. That would be the worst thing to do and most certainly hypothermia would set in.

She contemplates tugging the water gun from her waistband to swallow the brandy inside, but common sense tells her alcohol wouldn't help. It might warm her up a little but along with that came the side effect of slowing her down. Also brandy could dull that common sense leaving her vulnerable to listening to her body.

So what to do? Keep moving. Keep hoping. Keep believing. A Journey song popping into her head she forces her lips apart and begins singing it as best she can through the shivers. Great. I'm starting to lose it. Reminding herself to keep her shit together Mariah's steps quicken.

Noah. Eyes narrowing and a growl produced she swears thinking of him warms her up a little. Therefore, the thoughts persist. What she and Tessa did was wrong. She won't ever deny that, but how Noah chose to react was completely uncalled for. She didn't deserve this. Tessa didn't deserve an intentional pregnancy without her consent.

He took it too far. Mariah wouldn't have blamed him if he insulted her to the moon and back. She even wouldn't have blamed him if he took his story to The Hilary Hour making it public knowledge what his girlfriend and sister did behind his back. Hell, he could've even hit her because if she were his male sibling no one would think twice about him throwing a punch.

But this? Too damn much and the further Mariah walked the more hate crept into her frigid, paling body. Noah is her family. Her only brother. She doesn't want to hate him. It saddens her to do so, yet she cannot help it. Although she hates what he just did to her, she despises him more for what he did to Tessa.

Certainly he didn't force himself on her, but he violated her for his own selfish reasons. Had Tessa desired him at all? It made Mariah sick to her stomach to imagine Tessa giving her body to Noah and deep down not really wanting to do so. Merely feeling obligated and guilty.

The moment Mariah attempts to ball her hands into fists it proves difficult as she discovers they have begun to numb. Perhaps she should wish her entire body to be numb including her brain then she wouldn't have to worry over what could potentially happen. She wouldn't have to fear this was her last night on earth. Wouldn't have to fear what havoc Noah could be wreaking on Tessa in Genoa City.

Mariah wants to cry but believes her tear ducts might be frozen. She wants to scream but her throat feels too tight. Oh God, this could be it. Twenty-seven years old and it seemed quite possible she wouldn't live to see another birthday.