All Love Lost (ON HOLD)

Chapter 18

"I love you."

As soon as the words left my mouth, I regretted it. Not because I didn't mean it - I'd never play with those words - but because of his reaction.

He froze.

Aside from kissing me on the forehead and assuring that he'd 'see me', that was all I got from him before he left my apartment.

That was over a week ago.

And I hadn't seen or talked to him since.

I'd called and texted him quite a few times, but my pride wouldn't allow me to continue. If he wanted to talk to me he would've responded already.

As a result though, I threw myself into work to keep myself from thinking about him or incessantly trying to contact him. For the past few days I had been running from fashion show to fashion show and I was just glad my work week was coming to an end. It was nice seeing my designs modeled as well as seeing other people's reactions to them, but I was exhausted.

After picking up a few groceries and a new toy for Bear, I headed home. With multiple bags in my hands, I took the elevator up to my floor and I was surprised to see a vase filled with at couple dozen white roses sitting in front of my door.

I unlocked the door and balanced both the grocery bags as well as the large arrangement in my arms, bringing them both inside. Once I fished out Bear's toy, I tossed it to him along with a couple of his favorite treats to make up for my recent absence. I then put up the few items I'd picked up from the store and popped one of my pre made meals into the microwave.

Even though Adrian had been skipping out in our gym sessions, I still managed to stay on track with my workouts as well as my meal prepping. I was starting to think I didn't need him as much as I thought I did.

I was getting ready to just chill out on the couch a watch ratchet TV when I remembered the flower arrangement that I'd received. I paced over to where they sat on my island and searched through them for a card. I already knew who they were from, but I was annoyed at the fact that he would send me flowers, but not pick up the phone or respond to a simple text.

Finally, I reached the small card stuck deep between the rose stems and pulled it out. On it was a simple message that read:

I'm sorry.

Sorry for making me feel dumb? Sorry for ignoring me? I wanted so badly to call him to tell him to be more specific, but the beeping microwave broke me of those thoughts.

I grabbed my food and carried it over to the couch where Bear was waiting patiently for me to cuddle with him as we did almost every night.

"You think mama needs to just forget about men for a while?" I questioned an almost sleep Bear as I scratched behind his ears.

He only whimpered and laid his head back down on my lap.

"I know. I know." Bear and Adrian got along really well - especially since Adrian would almost always bring him something whenever he came over. "I miss his mean ass too." I admitted to myself.

A short time later, Bear was knocked out, my food was gone, and I had grown tired of the grown women acting like children over nonsense. So, I took a shower and took myself to bed.

It didn't feel like I was sleep long before I thought I heard knocking on my front door. When I opened my eyes, I noticed the sun was shining brightly through my windows, indicating that it wasn't that early. And when I checked my phone and saw that it was in fact 8:30, only confirmed that for me.

The knocking continued, so I pulled myself from the bed and shuffled across the cold hardwood floor until I reached the door. Curious as to who it could be, I stood on the tips of my toes to look through the peephole.